Mill City 6/5/16 Mill City 6/5/16

Intro to Covenant

Transcript

The old testament can be intimidating ground for Christians it's a bit of a haze of stories and histories and it isn't always chronological you've probably heard of David slain Goliath joseph being sold by his brothers because of his awesome cool jacket daniel getting thrown into the lion's den noah building an ark and jonah getting swallowed by a giant fish but do you know in which order they happened if our old testament history is rusty we have a problem because in order to truly understand everything that.

Jesus does we have to understand what his people have been through and the history of the culture that he stepped into it's also essential for our understanding of the context of many old testament stories in this video we're going to walk through a zoomed out overview of the entire old testament so that when we pick up the Bible and turn to isaiah or Exodus or nehemiah you'll at least have a big picture understanding of where the story fits into the grand scheme of things we're going to tag all the major players along the road.

But we're going to be moving pretty fast it all begins with creation in the garden of eden with adam God creates adam and eve and places them into authority over all creation deceived by Satan adam and eve sin and they're kicked out of the garden they have a few sons most famously cain and abel over the next few generations great corruption fills the earth and we meet noah noah and his family build an ark and they along with the animals on board survive the great flood which destroys pretty much everything else somewhere during this time is.

When scholars believe that the story of job takes place now we aren't exactly sure about the timing but we do know that the lessons are universal and so the timing isn't really that important ten generations after noah Abraham turns up Abraham and his wife sarah promise they will have a great nation as descendants uh that they will receive land and that they will receive God's blessing Abraham and sarah have Isaac even though they're ridiculously old and then Isaac marries rebecca and they have Jacob and esau Jacob.

Well he has a crush on rachel but he gets tricked into marrying her sister leah he ends up marrying both of them anyway and then having a whole bunch of kids and somewhere in the midst of all this God renames him Israel and then in a simplified way his kids become what we know of as the 12 tribes of Israel joseph is the favorite of these children the other kids they weren't so fond of this favoritism and they sell joseph to slave traders in egypt.

Well eventually the whole family migrates to egypt to survive the great famine that's happening in palestine the Israelites begin to grow in number in egypt and becoming a threat to the Pharaoh he enslaves all of them that's when Moses turns up the ten plagues happen and the Israelites escape across the red sea now they head to mount sinai which is where they receive the law including the ten commandments but they sin against God and they end up wandering the desert for 40 years during this time comes the books of leviticus numbers and deuteronomy Moses dies and joshua picks up the reins and he leads the Israelites back into the promised land the land is divided.

Up according to the 12 tribes next comes the period known as the judges God appoints a series of leaders to help guide his people and lead them against the enemies that oppose them the most well-known judges are deborah gideon and samson but there were actually many others ruth also appears during this time but she wasn't a judge or even jewish the people of Israel see that all the other nations have a king and they plead with God to give them a king.

So that they can be like everyone else well God allows it and Saul becomes the first king of Israel Israel is pleased and seoul leads them reasonably well at least until they come up against the philistines and of course Goliath in comes David who slays Goliath and wins the war on Israel's behalf David ends up becoming the next king and he wrote many of the psalms David was followed by his son Solomon who wrote proverbs ecclesiastes and probably also the song of Solomon.

When Solomon dies things get complicated the kingdom splits in two and for the next few centuries there's two kingdoms that play a part of the story there's the northern kingdom known as Israel comprised of 10 of the original tribes which is led by jeroboam who was one of Solomon's commanders in the army then there's the southern kingdom known as judah comprised of two of the original tribes which is led by rehoboam who was Solomon's son i told you it was complicated this is the period of time.

When the books that we know of as the prophets begin during the divided kingdom era we have isaiah micah habakkuk zephaniah and nahim who prophesy to the southern kingdom of judah and then we have jonah hosea and amos who prophesied of the northern kingdom Israel the prophets are sent to guide God's people and deliver his messages to the people they give a whole lot of warnings promising imminent destruction unless the people repent and follow God well the people don't repent in 722 bc assyria conquered the northern kingdom of Israel all the way around the surrounding areas down to egypt leaving only judah they exiled all of the people of Israel and scattered them throughout the.

Entire kingdom replacing them with exiles from other areas of their expanding kingdom the ten northern tribes while they were completely wiped from history the southern kingdom of judah will they put up a good fight and they survived the assyrians but they failed to serve God fully the babylonians under king nebuchadnezzar rose up and wiped out the assyrian empire and over the course of about 20 years conquered and deported all of the jews from the southern kingdom of judah back to babylon the prophets daniel ezekiel jeremiah who also wrote the book of lamentations and probably also over daya they all prophesied around this time.

For about 50 years the jews stayed in babylon under babylonian exile then in came persia the persians conquered the babylonians and all of their land and in 538 bc king cyrus made a decree that all of the jews could go back home in three waves led by zerubbabel ezra and nehemiah respectively the jews went back into Israel and rebuilt Jerusalem and the temple haggai zechariah and probably joel prophesied during this time now we know that some of the jews didn't return home.

Because the story of esther takes place in persia after the three waves of returning exiles the last we hear about Israel in the old testament is from Malachi probably 450 years bc Malachi calls God's people to return to covenantal faithfulness and await for his present coming during the 450-ish years between the old and new testament power changes hands a number of times persia remains in power up until 3 30 bc when alexander the great also known as the greek empire takes over the whole known world in seven years.

Well he dies young and the empire crumbles in certain areas and while the greek influence remains strong the area of palestine is ruled intermittently by syria and egypt under the maccabees the jews established a wobbly independence in the land for about a century and in 63 bc Jerusalem fell to the roman empire which pretty much conquered everything Jesus was born during the rule of the roman empire and in comes the new testament so there you have it an overview of the entire old testament.

Now hopefully when you read through the old testament you'll have at least a decent handle on where you find yourself in the grand scheme of God's narrative.

This week we referred to a video and a white board on stage. See below attachments for reference.

Raz Bradley 2/7/16 Raz Bradley 2/7/16

Sugar, Spice & Everything Nice?

Our culture puts an immense amount of pressure on women. So many women are crushed by the weight of having a perfect body, perfect kids, and perfect relationships. But is that really what it means to be a woman? What if femininity has nothing to do with wearing a dress?

Transcript

Well, good morning. We are in the fourth week of our series, The Theology of Sex, where we're just taking some time to look at what the Bible has to say about gender, sexuality, romance, marriage, masculinity, femininity. A lot of times, we love the Bible. I have a problem. I start multiple sentences and that wasn't going to work out well together. A lot of times, because we love the Bible, we just study straight through a book of the Bible.

We'll just open it up. We'll go straight through. We spent a good bit of time this past year in 1 Peter. Some people might say a little too much time, but we walked verse by verse through 1 Peter. Really, we like the Bible. We study the Bible.

We believe that it's Scripture that helps us grow, that changes us, that Jesus works through that, through the Holy Spirit, to move us and to change us. But we also like to take time to say, okay, we're confused about this or we're having a hard time with this in our culture. And then we, instead of just studying straight through a book, we'll actually just kind of go to the Bible and say, what does the Bible have to say about these topics? And try to dig in that way. And that's kind of what we're doing right now. We're just spending some time talking about the theology of sex.

So last week, we talked about masculinity. We talked about what it meant to be a man, what biblical manhood was. And this week, we're going to talk about femininity, what it means to be a woman, what biblical womanhood is. And in general, in our culture, we're a little bit more positive towards women right now in our culture. We, in general, celebrate women. We want to promote women.

And there's really good examples of women in the workplace. And just in our culture, we're trying to look for ways to promote, to highlight. We kind of agree as a culture that women are great, even when maybe culturally the jury's still out on men. We're kind of on board with the idea that women are good, like we're pro-woman. And that hasn't always been the case throughout history. And that really is kind of a small window right now where we're saying, no, we need to, women are wonderful.

Let's promote them. Let's highlight them. But just because the climate is different for men and women, I actually don't think it makes it easier to be a woman. I don't really know, but I don't think it does. Just because there's so much now where it's the cause for, you need to be free from a man. You need to be, this is where joy comes from.

This is where freedom comes from. And then you'll also have the, no, if you just find the right man, then you'll be complete, then you'll be fulfilled. Or freedom comes from a career, or you have these mommy blogs that are like, you need to raise your own chickens and grow your own kale so that your kid doesn't turn into some weird high fructose corn syrup blob of a monster. Like all of this pressure to be all of these things. And it just seems in general like it makes being a woman more difficult kind of in our culture. And we really need to have a good handle on what is femininity?

What is the essence of womanhood? Because it just seems like we've got kind of a cluttered message out there right now. When my wife and I sit down and watch TV in the evenings, mostly, I look pretty good. Like as long as I'm not like an overgrown boy, I kind of know my kid's name and talk to my wife and have a job. And in general, I'm not an idiot. I'm beating most of the people we watch on TV.

Like most of the characters in shows, I look pretty good. But my wife, there's a lot of like really good examples of women in these shows that just have everything together. They've got their jobs working out perfectly. They're the one that tends to the house. Whenever the kids have problems, they fix it. And it just seems like there's a lot of pressure on females to kind of be everything at this point.

And so we really want to just kind of get some handles on biblically. What is the essence of femininity? What does it mean to be feminine, to kind of stretch into and press into womanhood? And so a few kind of disclaimers as we get started. One, I am aware that I am a man and therefore not a woman. But like always, we're going to try to open the Bible and say, here's we're going to let Scripture teach us, God instruct us and try to to learn as best we can from the text and not from personal opinion or personal experience, which I have very little of.

So single ladies in the room, like last week, femininity is not based off of role. So you don't have to be a wife. You don't have to be a mother. It doesn't wait for those things. That's not the completion of womanhood throughout Scripture. Let me just say this to help the ladies in the room that that read the Bible on a regular basis, that you study the Bible on a regular basis.

You read the Bible on a regular basis and you just kind of like, I don't see a lot of single women in Scripture. You are correct. There aren't a lot of single women in Scripture. Reason being is two primary reasons. One is in the Old Testament, we're mostly following the story of a family. So God's working through a race, through a people.

And so most of the major characters are going to be people who line up in that family. And so we're going to follow a lot of wives and mothers when you when they enter into the story because it's a people group. God was working through a family leading up to the lineage of Jesus. That's why the New Testament is going to start off with lineages. And most of the women that were highlighted in the Old Testament line up in those lineages. The other thing is just culturally.

There wasn't a lot of room for females to go get jobs, to just enter the marketplace. Just culturally, it didn't work that way. Most people were farmers. Most females were married off at a very young age. And so just because Scripture gives a lot of examples of wives and mothers, it does not mean that it's wrong to be single. Well, actually, in the New Testament, Paul's going to say it's great to be single.

You do really well to be single actually affirms singleness and says that's a beautiful, wonderful way to live and to reflect the image of God. And that's that's good and wonderful. And people don't have to get married. So even as we study Scripture and as you study Scripture and you see a lot of mothers and wives, they're going to live out their femininity in the role they were given. And you're going to get to do the same in the roles that you have. So femininity isn't based off of role.

It's actually just going to express itself through the roles that you're given. And so don't have to be married. Don't have to be a mother. Femininity is much deeper than that. So as we go in, just remember that men in the room, I'm going to intentionally, overtly, maybe even at times a little bit aggressively go after some of the moronic stereotypes that we have of women.

And your role will be to repent of the ones that you have believed and anywhere that you have helped propagate those. And then actively in the future to tell people to shut up and to help them not continue. So that's that's what you get to do. Also, it's about a thousand times easier for females to to express and to step into their femininity when men express and step into their masculinity. For the most part, when men abdicate their role, women step in and begin to cultivate and provide and protect like we talked about last week. And it becomes dang near impossible for them to do both for them to pick up your slack and do what they're supposed to.

So one of the best ways that we love the ladies in the room is by actually being men. And so if you didn't hear the sermon last week, I would encourage you to listen to it and then seek to grow with us as we try to be men. Guys in the room, if you're single and feel called to get married and are looking to date, this is what you're looking for in a female. And this is if you're married, what you're encouraging and celebrating in your wife. OK, one more one more quick caveat. I am I want I want us to remember that what we're talking about, we're saying specifically this is essence of femininity.

This is something that is core to femininity. This is maybe an issue that maybe ladies struggle with more. When we say those things, we don't mean men can't do these things or if a man does them, he's wrong in the same way. We didn't mean that last week. So if you're like, wait a second, I'm not supposed to protect.

I'm not supposed to provide just because I'm a woman. It's like, no, we're not saying that. We're just saying that's essential to masculinity. So it's like I looked at my wife one time. We're about to leave and go somewhere. I said, I said, you look, I really like that shirt.

She looked at me and she went, you don't like my other shirts. And I was like, why would you take it that way? Why would that? Why would one compliment to a shirt immediately be like me attacking all of your other clothes? That's not what I. So if we say something in a positive way, this is for femininity.

Don't immediately turn it around and apply it to everything else because we're not trying to say that. So don't be like my wife, I guess, is the way that's supposed to work. So I didn't mean it quite that way. I'm going to pray because, Lord, I need help. And we're going to hop in and try to avoid more ditches. God, we thank you that you're good.

We thank you that you're gracious to us. And we pray, Lord, that in this that we would study your word and that we would grow in our understanding of what femininity is, how you designed humanity, both male and female, on purpose and with a good design that brings joy and human flourishing. We pray for the ladies in the room that they would press into you as they learn to press into and flex and grow in their God-given design. In Jesus' name we pray. Amen. All right, we're going to be in Genesis chapter 1 and chapter 2, and then we'll move around a little bit.

But we'll start there this morning. Genesis chapter 1 is on page 1 in this Bible. If you don't own a Bible, this is our gift to you. Take it with you. Genesis chapter 1, starting in verse 26, 27, and 28. We're going to read that real quick together.

We've read this about every week through this series because it's essential to us understanding gender and sexuality. Then God said, Let us make man in our image after our likeness, and let them, such humanity, have dominion over the fish of the sea and over the birds of the heavens and over the livestock and over all the earth and over every creeping thing that creeps on the earth. So God created man in his own image. In the image of God, he created him. Male and female, he created them. And God blessed them and God said to them, Be fruitful and multiply and fill the earth and subdue it and have dominion over the fish of the sea and over the birds of the heavens and over every living thing that moves on the earth.

So God in creation makes male and female in his image and likeness. That both masculinity and femininity are designed to reflect God to the world. That both are. So it has been wrongly taught and wrongly taught from this passage, from a poor reading of the text, that this is only that men are made in God's image and females are not. It has been wrongly taught that women are innately inferior to men, and that is garbage. It's not true.

It clearly says that male and female were made in the image of God, and that that was God's good design from the very beginning. That there are ways that masculinity images God and ways that femininity images God. I'm going to try to say womanhood from now on, because that's going to get harder and harder as the day goes on. Womanhood images God that masculinity can't. So God intentionally designed manhood and womanhood differently on purpose.

So there have been the wrong ideas of women are inferior to men. They need to be barefoot in the kitchen. They need to know their role. They need to know their place. And that that is completely backwards, incorrect and is a as a heinous, aggressive stare down in the face of God's good design to make women in his image. And we completely reject that.

And out of that has arisen, actually, a rightly began the movement of feminism, looked at that and rejected that idea correctly, correctly rejected that idea. But then went the opposite direction with it. So that feminism says women and men are the same. If not, women are better than men. They can do everything a man can do. They're designed to operate the same way men are designed.

And they can do all the same things. They're designed the same way and are even better and superior in a lot of ways. And it's like, no, actually, God, when he designed humanity, made them distinct on purpose. That it's more than a biological distinction over how babies are made. That he actually intentionally created a gulf and made masculinity a certain way and femininity a certain way, far beyond biology, that was designed to be lived out in a way that together imaged him. That they were not complete without him.

So that masculinity and femininity are designed to complement one another, to shore up each other's weaknesses, to make each other's strengths stronger. One of the ways that this shows up, he gives them the, he says, God blessed them and said, be fruitful and multiply and subdue the earth. So the call to human flourishing is given to humanity in general, to males and females together, to work together, to subdue the earth. And it would not happen outside of both being there. Outside of masculinity and femininity playing out on a global scale, you wouldn't have human flourishing. One of the coolest examples of this, that's kind of in our own country, and I heard somebody talking about it recently and it reminded me of a Ken Burns documentary.

I don't know if you all know about Ken Burns, but that man can document stuff. And he does a lot of like PBS documentaries and stuff. And I watched one of the Old Wests. And when the West got started, when U.S. citizens started moving out that way, it was mostly just men. Men went, they were hunting, they were kind of trapping, getting furs, they were chasing after gold, they were chasing after land, they were being chased after by people. But they all just kind of moved out that way, and it was just men.

And there were a lot of like shanty towns and tents, and it was pretty terrible. But it was mostly just men that moved out there. It wasn't until the second wave when a large proportion of females went with them. And then suddenly, towns, laws, streets, like systems of government. Men by themselves could only take it so far. They were like, I'm here, there's a tent.

I use the bathroom over there. Got it. Like it was for some reason, masculinity only had half the picture. Like it could only handle so much. And then it wasn't until masculinity and femininity worked together that we began to see flourishing, began to see sustainable forms of life and growth. And honestly, that's kind of the picture we see at the very beginning of Scripture, where God makes male and female on purpose and says, this is how the world is going to flourish, is if you work together distinctly complementing one another.

So let's hop in. Let's look at some three essential ways that women image God to the world. And we're going to start in Genesis chapter 2. We're going to look at 15 and 18 to begin to see this. So Genesis chapter 2, that's one page over.

Oh, I jumped away too many pages. 15. The Lord God took the man and put him in the Garden of Eden to work it and keep it. That's what we talked about last week. So God takes the man and puts him in the Garden of Eden to work it and keep it.

And then he says something really kind of surprising in the text in verse 18. Then the Lord God said, it is not good that the man should be alone. I will make a helper fit for him. If you've been reading through Genesis 1 and into Genesis 2, every time it would say God said something, he did something, and he saw that it was good. And then God said something, he saw it, and it was good. And God said something, he saw it, and it was good.

This is the first time that God does something and then goes, that's not good. And it's not a slight on Adam. It's just that masculinity alone is incomplete. Manhood alone is incomplete. And so when God designs femininity, he intentionally designs it different. He did not make one generic human person.

It wasn't like, oh, he just needs a team. No, he specifically intentionally made femininity different from masculinity. Womanhood different from manhood in order to work together on it. And so it says that I will make a helper fit for him. So the first kind of essential thing we see, we're going to look at that word helper.

And so immediately you're going, really? Helper? That's what we're starting off with? Yes, helper is what we're starting off with. It's from the word azer in the text. And it's really kind of two words stuck together.

It's the word strength and rescue kind of smooshed together. So the idea of helper in the text is not the idea that we have where we'll say stuff like, oh, you're going to be my little helper today. It's not at all what we're talking about. It's kind of the same as I was at the zoo the other day and was looking at a tiger and the little things like, tiger is a part of the cat family. And it's like, yeah, but they're a lot different from cats though, right? And so when we say the word helper, we kind of hear cat.

And it's like, sure, technically, but think more tiger. So when it says strong rescuer, that word helper is used 21 times in the Old Testament. 17 times it's referring to God. It's always referring to this moment of like a last ditch. Everything was going to be terrible until help came, until rescue came. The Septuagint, which is the Greek version of the Old Testament, actually translates that word auxiliary, which would be a backup reinforcement unit in the military.

So when it says that God looked at Adam and said he needs a helper, he doesn't mean little sidekick teammate. He means he needs a strong, empowering rescuer in some ways. That if you were reading the text in the original Hebrew, you'd be going, okay, this isn't looking good. This isn't looking good. Ah, reinforcements. We're not going to lose this battle.

This is actually going to work out. And so when it comes to biblical essence of femininity, one of the things woven into the heart and soul of womanhood is this, to be a helper, to be an ezer, which is, think about the idea of foreign aid. When a country comes to another nation, they're torn apart by war and famine and poverty, and they approach a bigger, stronger nation and say, hey, we need your help. We need you to step in and lend us your strength. That's the concept here. That's the picture we're given of biblical femininity, which means this.

Your strength exists for the benefit of others. Biblical femininity is that you were given strength on purpose for the benefit of others. That you're designed to notice weakness. That you're designed to notice pain. That you're designed to see those who need help and step in and empower them and equip them and help them. To step in where there's brokenness and bring healing and joy and life.

That's the idea here. It's like a mother that, over time, pours out her life for a child that is going to take life out of her and take life out of her and take life out of her. And less and less and less over time until the child is a full-grown, capable adult. That's the idea. That you would come around everyone around you. And it doesn't have anything to do with role.

It doesn't have anything to do with where you find yourself. You're going to do this with your roommates. You're going to do this with your community group. You're going to do this with your husband, with your children. You're going to look and see weakness. You're designed to see weakness and pain and step in and realize that your strength exists to be on loan for others.

That your energy exists to be on loan for others. That your joy exists to be on loan for others. To empower them and equip them. So there's currently kind of a conversation going on where there's this movement for if anybody around you drains you. If anybody around you is needy, you just need to get rid of that person. You just need to get them out of your life.

They're just a leech. They're just sucking the life out of you. You need to get rid of them. That's actually very unhelpful. Because part of the design of femininity is to pour out your life and your energy for the behalf of others. To lend your strength for others to grow strong and to be healthy.

And so one of the ways that this can... It is designed for other people to grow, to be empowered and to be equipped and to be sent out. It's not designed to be codependency. To where you only feel valuable if you're needed. So there have been, and even like in situations where a husband is on drugs and having issues with drugs.

Where a wife will actually come along at some point when he's doing better and help him relapse. Because she only understands her role as being needed. And if he's not on drugs, she doesn't understand how she has value anymore. It's not that idea at all. It's not the idea that you have to be needed at all times. It's just that you notice, step in, equip, empower and send out.

We sometimes use the term woman's intuition. So like my wife and I will go hang out with people and when we'll leave, she'll go... So, what was up with Gary? What? What was going on with him? Nothing?

There was definitely something going on with him. No, there wasn't. Y'all didn't talk about it? Talk about what? The thing that was going on. There wasn't a thing going on.

Like, we have these conversations all the time. She's like, what was wrong with them? Or I'll go hang out with someone that I already know there's a thing going on. And when I come back, she'll go, so what did y'all talk about? I'll be like, nothing. What about that problem they're having?

Oh, yeah. Nope. Didn't come up. How did it not come up? He didn't bring it up. I didn't.

I didn't. I didn't bring it up. What am I going to say? How's that pain going? Like, I'm not. But there's just something in femininity in her for her to notice that, to be drawn to that, and to step in, to help, to equip, to fix.

And honestly, there's a little bit of, okay, but what about my strength existing for me? What about what I'm equipped with existing for me? But the truth is, this is a very biblical concept to its core for humanity, not just femininity. That Jesus is going to say, deny yourself. He's going to say, pick up your cross, follow me. He's going to say that if you seek your own life, you'll lose it.

But if you lose your life for my sake, you'll gain it. He's going to say that he didn't come to be served, but to serve and to give his life on behalf of others. And there's actually something very godly in a way that you image God by using your strength for the benefit of others. That it's written into your soul. You're designed to do it. To see weakness, to step in, to equip, and to help.

The second one that we're going to see, we're going to jump to 320. We're just kind of following along this story, looking at Eve and realizing that a lot of this is talking specifically about her, but we're just trying to see as a type, as the first woman, as the first essence of femininity, representative of all femininity on earth. How does this play out? What is she called to? And how does this continue? So verse 20 says, the man called his wife's name Eve because she was the mother of all living.

Okay, this is actually really interesting where this shows up. It says he called his wife's name Eve. Eve means life because she was the mother of all living. This is prior to her having any children. So a lot of times, in a lot of cultures, not our culture, people are named names, given names based off of their characteristics, based off of their role, based off of who they are.

So in the Bible, there's a guy named Barnabas, which just means he's an encourager. They gave him that name because he was already encouraging. They weren't just like, hey, you seem like in the future you might encourage people. I'm going to start calling you Barnabas. It's like, hey, weirdo, don't change my name. It's like, but he was very encouraging.

So they just like, that became his nickname. That's what they called him. They changed his name to that. A lot of cultures still do this. My cousins, my parents, my grandparents were missionaries in Nigeria. I've got some first generation African-American cousins from Nigeria.

And one of my cousins married a guy named John. And it's really funny when I get to introduce them to people because I get to say, this is my cousin John. This is my cousin Iannu. Sorry, I messed it up. This is my cousin Iannu and her husband John. And John is aggressively white like I am.

He's got a big head. He's got kind of reddish beard like I do. And so immediately when I say, this is my cousin Iannu and her husband John, people like twitch because it's like, wait, I think he said that wrong. Because this is your cousin, the big white guy that looks like you. And so it's always fun. But this past Christmas, they sent from Nigeria, from their family, sent over clothes for all of them and had written their names in the clothes that they sent.

So they were going to have traditional Nigerian clothes and they've written their names in it. And John saw his and it said, John Oyinbo. And he looked at my uncle, my uncle Abel and goes, oh, Oyinbo, is that like my Nigerian name? And my uncle started laughing so hard he couldn't talk. Like he was like wheezing, couldn't get words out. Finally, when he caught his breath, he said, it means John white guy.

They also call you Okalawan, which is different person. But there's this idea in a lot of cultures that you get a name that goes with who you are. You get a name that kind of defines your. And so when he names her Eve, when he names her life and says she's the mother of life prior to her having children, there's actually this picture of not just she's going to be the mother of everyone, not just she is the mother of all life later, but also just this design in her, in femininity to bring life, to give life, to be a refuge is kind of the second idea we're going to look at this morning. So it's one of the ways that helped me understand this idea was I was reading a book by C.S.

Lewis and he was talking about his relationship with his father and his relationship with his mother. And when he was really young, his mother passed away. And after she passed away, he wrote this in this book. He said, with my mother's death, all settled happiness, all that was tranquil and reliable disappeared from my life. There was to be much fun, many pleasures, many stabs at joy, but no more of the old security. It was sea and islands.

Now, the great continent had sunk like Atlantis. There's just this idea that without his mother, there there wasn't the same amount of of a refuge. His home wasn't home anymore. It was certainly a place to go to when he was out of school, certainly a place to be. But he never would feel quite like he was just free, just at home.

It's kind of the idea of if last week we said manhood is like being four walls and a roof, then femininity is a fireplace. It's everything that makes life livable. It's it's it's and it's not your ability to Martha Stewart, your house or to Pinterest, the fool out of everything. It has nothing to do with that. It doesn't have anything to do with your craftiness and whether or not your house has anything on the wall at all. It doesn't have have anything to do with you own a home.

It all it is is that home is where you are. Family is where you are. And we've all known people like this that just set us free to be ourselves. You know, you have certain friends and maybe your family that when you get around them, you're just more you than you are anywhere else. You're just a little less guarded, a little more free. I'm like this with my brothers.

They already know everything about me. So it's just and they have to be my brother forever. Like I just if I took them off, it's like, see you later. You're still my brother. See you at Christmas. How do you like them apples?

Like there's no no getting rid of me. And then there are certain people you get around and they just do the same thing. Certain ladies you get around and they just completely make you feel at home, make you feel welcome, make you feel free. And that's the idea of that she almost the infemininity written into the soul of femininity is the idea that you're actually a little bit of a mother to everybody. And I mean that in the most beautiful way, like the idea that everybody becomes part of your family. Everybody is fully welcome and free around you.

I can remember when I was in high school, my mom, any any story I had to tell, she was interested in just because I was telling the story. Like all that mattered was I was one of the characters in the story and she was happy, just like if I thought it was interesting. So I didn't the threshold for what she wanted to hear when I came home from school was very, very low. So on the way home, I'd be like, all right, let me think of something I can tell my mom. And I come up with some story that was just really not even a story. It didn't have any plot twists.

It didn't even really have any kind of where it was going. It was just like a thing. And in the middle of these stories a lot, my dad would walk into the room and he'd go, what? And I'd go, no, nothing. And he'd go, no, what? What are y'all talking about?

Because my mom would be laughing. She would actually make this story that wasn't a story like sound good. She'd laugh. She'd ask questions. She'd be like, what was his name? How did that happen?

Oh, my goodness. A Pepsi Cola. Like she just would make it like it didn't have to have any point. And somebody would go, what? What? No, y'all are talking.

What is it? And I'd go, this guy at school, he didn't have his homework. Before the teacher was going to take it up, he freaked out. And my dad would go, that's a stupid story. And walk off. And this happened on a regular basis.

And he never learned that the story wasn't going to be good. I like, he has a threshold for what makes a good story. I know that. I don't tell these stories to him. But there was something about my mom that just made it free.

Made me get to be me in a way that nobody else does. And there's something in femininity that allows you to just lower everybody's guard. That you're designed to make people feel comfortable and welcome and free. And it doesn't have anything to do with personality type. My wife's very quiet, very reserved. Three of her best friends were, it was a girl her age, a girl that was her sister, four or five years older, and their mom.

And that group of, that family, those three ladies, they believe if they have a thought, they had it for them to share with you. If they have an opinion, it was designed for them to say it out loud. They are very flamboyant, loud, happy, loud people. And they absolutely are themselves and they make you feel like yourself when you're around them. It doesn't have anything to do with personality type. It has to do with the ability to, you're not being judged.

You're not being graded. You're not having to live up to a standard. Ladies, if you're consistently having to compare yourself to other people and having to jockey for position and posture yourself to look good, you destroy your ability to do this. Because people aren't free around you because you need them to build you up. But when you're free in Christ to just be open to everybody, to just be welcoming to everybody, you get to kind of step into this role where home is where you are.

Family is where you are and your circle of concern just extends to everybody around you. My grandmother is like this. She hasn't met a person that she hasn't just adopted into her family for however long she's known them. Whether that's they sat near each other on a plane or she knew them for a couple of years before she moved or they moved. Everyone around her, she extends her circle of concern and they are just welcome with her. They're a part of her family the same that everyone else is.

And there's just something distinct in femininity that allows that to happen, that allows you to welcome and to be a refuge to everyone around you. And it doesn't have anything to do with personality type, with role. It actually is just something that's designed in the nature of womanhood. The third one is kind of interesting. So we're going to jump back into the narrative here in Genesis chapter 223.

We're going to look at the narrative and then we're going to go to 1 Peter to try to understand this one a little bit better. 2 Peter to try to understand this one a little bit better. 2 Peter to try to understand this one a little bit better. 2 Peter to try to understand this one a little bit better. So God had put Adam on earth.

2 Peter to try to understand this one a little bit better. 2 Peter to try to understand this one a little bit better. 2 Peter to try to understand this one a little bit better. So God had put Adam on earth. He had had him name all the animals. So he brought animal after animal after animal by named all the animals and said there was no suitable empowering strength, no suitable auxiliary for him, no suitable helper. and so then he makes Eve and he brings him to Eve and then it says the man said this at last is bone of my bones and flesh of my flesh she shall be called a woman because she was taken out of man so when Adam sees Eve we get the first poetry in history it's either poetry or song it's not great I know you read it and you're like Adam bro step up your game man like this isn't I don't even like it doesn't rhyme hopefully it rhymed in Hebrew this isn't really great but what he what he does it's a little bit of this moment where his his heart finds resonance with her he he feels like finally he actually starts off with at last it's like that song at last like he just he sees her and it's just like and and there's this idea in creation and in God God is beautiful he's designed to be captivating to be delighted in there's over and over in the Psalms where David and other psalmists are writing and saying I just want to look at you I just want to stare at you I just want to be caught up in you and God specifically designed creation to be beautiful and there's something about femininity that has some of that impressed in it and it is not physical beauty or at least not only physical beauty so let's jump to first Peter before this gets really confusing and we take this in the wrong direction first Peter three says this is first Peter uh some of y'all familiar with this we spent the time studying this last year uh do not let your adorning be external okay uh some versions are going to translate that do not let your adorning be

External only and the word adorning there is cosmos which really means world so we use the the world the same way that sometimes we will say uh his whole world is sports uh that family that like her kids or her whole world so what he's saying is don't let your whole everything around you your whole existence be external the braiding of hair and the putting on of gold jewelry or the clothing you wear but let your adorning be the hidden person of the heart with the imperishable beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit which in God's side is very precious God specifically in creation made things beautiful made them to have a a weight and a gravity to be delighted in and gazed upon and there's something specific to femininity that evokes that that God has impressed his own way that that women image the image God is through a captivating personhood through a soul-stirring beauty and our culture has twisted this and marred this and bulldozed this into some nonsense we have absolutely turned it into a physical only sham of what God designed it to be we we are we have held up as a standard airbrushed supermodels that don't even look like that like they've had so much photoshopping and airbrushing they don't even look like the standard that they're propagating we're holding up a unicorn culturally and saying that this is what beauty is and peter's saying no no don't let your adorning only be that there's something in femininity that is for beautifying beautifying the world beautifying yourself making things beautiful but don't let it be can you go back to first peter don't let it be external only let it be the hidden person of the heart let it be depth of soul that leads to beauty honestly as these first two things come together there can be an imperishable beauty that doesn't age that continues forever doesn't grow old doesn't need to have doctors step in later and fix things that there's a genuine depth of personhood that makes beauty that makes uh females a delight womanhood a delight to be gazed at there's some of you ladies realize this early and it starts early it's really interesting I was talking with josh pabone yesterday he's got four children he has two boys

And two girls his boys say this hey dad look at this hey dad look at this and they're like look at this and they're like hit their brother with a stick like look at this kick I can do look at this thing I set on fire look at this lizard I caught look look at me do this but it's always this look at this and his daughters he's got two daughters and they say dad look at me look at me look at me if they're even if they're doing an activity the thing is look at me do this activity the goal isn't to look at the activity is to look at me they'll get dressed up aren't I beautiful look at me they have this desire to be delighted in for themselves it's it's innate it's woven in and we have distorted it twisted it and marred it and traded it in for some nonsense we we sold out genuine soul-stirring depth of personhood we sold out genuine beauty for a cheap marred hollow expression of it we sold out soul level delight for a momentary lust heart stopping resonance for a heart racing momentary nonsense it's like we traded in a carnival roller coaster for a lifelong adventure it's not worth the exchange that you were designed to be beautiful to be captivating to be gazed upon to be delighted in but not just not a not just a physical thing but actually to have depth of personhood that is welcomed and loved and delighted in and and honestly out of this uh grows this desire so when he's talking about let your your world not only be external it grows this desire to build a veneer to to paint everything up as if it is perfect to paint up your whole life as if you have everything together and honestly perfection when it comes to a pursuit of perfection that's kind of just a a feminine thing ladies pursue perfection in a way that men do not that was there's a there's an article in the land at the atlantic recently that was talking about this it's talking about closing the confidence gap was the name of the article and they're basically writing saying that overqualified women still don't apply for jobs that they're overqualified for because they're not sure if they're quite qualified enough and that underqualified men apply in mass like have empirically the data shows this would be terrible you're going to break this in half and sink it and they're like I deserve a shot let me have at it I think I could do a good

Job like and it just it's it's baffling they said that um that women don't uh turn in reports until they've edited them ad nauseum that they've they just feel this weight of perfection that men just it just doesn't show up on their radar there was a they did a study at cornell in a in an engineering course where uh it was kind of a course where people would flunk out in the course is one of those courses that just you got kind of to the middle and it just created space in the school and they were doing a study on the the males in the class and the females in the class and whenever it got hard almost a hundred percent of the males uh reacted externally and this class is hard this professor's tough these tests just got ridiculous and almost a hundred percent of the females reacted internally I knew I wasn't smart enough to handle this I knew I wasn't I knew I knew I couldn't cut it there's this weight of perfection this weight of trying to build this everything's all right around me it seems to to specifically land on on feminine shoulders that's why uh barbie dolls we just now we have female shaped barbie dolls now so like we should celebrate like they're actually they've just come out with these uh but they made barbie dolls and there was this this is a standard of beauty that no one can live up to this is there's no way we can ever exist here there's no way this is crushing and then you can take like a he-man action figure and take the like most slouchy overweight guy and he'll be like I can kind of see me in that it's a little bit like me right here because there's just there's that weight it's just sitting there and there's this this push to be the the perfect mom the perfect daughter the the perfect employer the imperfect employee the perfect everything and and can I just help you out it's not going to happen it doesn't exist you're not you're not going to be perfect you're not you're not going to have it all together the ladies in in the u.s are three times more likely to attempt to commit suicide

91 Percent of women in the u.s say they're dissatisfied with their bodies uh... and and women are 10 to 19 times more likely to suffer from an eating disorder they did they did a study on uh... college students and they found that over half of the the females that were in whatever the the uh... correct weight range for their uh... body type or whatever were on diets even though they didn't really need to be adjusted like that for health reasons that need to be adjusting their diets like it was it's just crazy the amount of pressure and weight that gets put on and um... there's a there's a director over at midtown she's she helps head up their kid city area and she said that one of the things she feels this weight of um... proving that she's lovely so that she'll know that she's lovable she says she's felt that her whole life that if she could just prove that she's lovely then she'd know that she was lovable and the reason we're talking about this is that there is something in the design of femininity to be enjoyed to be captivating

But it's not it's not to be found in just a physical expression or just building these veneers around you to prove that you're okay let's go to Ephesians 5 this is a section that paul ends by saying that the true meaning of marriage is the way Jesus loves the church that the whole point behind marriage that we have now is to actually show us how Jesus loves the church and so he says this husbands love your wives just as christ also loved the church and gave himself up for her so that he might sanctify her this is the church this is his bride this is his people this is all those who place faith in Jesus he might sanctify her which means set apart having cleansed her by washing of the water with the word that he might present to himself the church in all her glory

Having no spot or wrinkle or any such thing but that she would be holy and blameless ladies you were designed for perfection you were designed to fully live out what it meant to have your strength benefit others you were designed to fully be so comfortable and free in yourself that everyone was welcome around you everyone was free to be themselves around you and you were designed to be captivating to be loved to be delighted in and sin has wrecked that ever since eve in the garden first believed the lie that God was holding out on her that he had hidden from her what it meant to truly be made in his image ladies have believed that ever since

And Jesus stepped in in the midst of our brokenness in the midst of our sin and he went to the cross on our behalf and he has made you blameless and perfect and holy and spotless without wrinkle or blemish or any such thing it says that Jesus loved the church gave himself up for her that he might sanctify her having cleansed her by the washing of the water with the word that he might present to himself the church in all her glory having no spot

Or wrinkle or any such thing but that she would be holy and blameless he actually saved the church just to present her to himself just to delight in the church in his bride that he's rescued and redeemed and only through resting in Jesus only through finding this to be true so deep and so soul level will you ever be free to know that your strength is on loan like Jesus's strength was on loan where Jesus stepped in and used his strength on behalf of others you get to step in

And realize that you've been gifted and equipped and strengthened for the benefit of those around you and you'll get to see that because Jesus has welcomed you into his home and made you into his family that you get to welcome everybody into your home make them into your family that you get to make home and family everywhere that you are for every person you're around and that you were designed to be delighted in and that through Jesus you are

You're perfectly spotless and blameless and free to be delighted in and welcomed and loved and ladies you're not perfect you're broken you're weak you're busted and that's okay because Jesus didn't leave you there he didn't leave you on your own to fix it on your own to make it all painted up and pretty and look good so that you could display it to the world but he actually stepped in and fixed

Every wrinkle spot and blemish on his own washed you through his own blood and made you his that he might delight in you you already have perfection you already have freedom you already have love and delight and joy through Jesus and only as you step into christ and only as you trust in the cross and only as you know that this is already true for you can you actually begin to be all that femininity

Was designed to be the band's gonna come back up we're gonna sing and praise Jesus and we're gonna together as a church family seek to step into masculinity and step into femininity in a way that doesn't have anything to do with stereotypes doesn't have anything to do with role doesn't have anything to do with personality types but has everything

To do with our desire to image God to the world to encourage one another to see flourishing happen and to begin to use everything we've been equipped with and gift with for the good of others for God's glory for our joy as we get to follow after him and if you haven't trusted fully in what the cross has provided for you you haven't fully seen

Jesus hanging on the cross to rescue to redeem to fix you to take away every spot and blemish and wrinkle every bit of imperfection that he might delight in you he might lift you up and it says the church in all her glory that Jesus makes the church beautiful and then delights in her

I'd encourage you to trust in Jesus today for your satisfaction your joy and ultimately your freedom God we praise you we ask Lord that you would bless the ladies in our church family that they would in the roles they're given in the time they have with their roommates in the time they have with their

Spouses with their children with their employees with their employers to give them the opportunity to use their strength to sacrifice on behalf of others to welcome everyone to make freedom and joy exist where they are and God I pray that you would

Help them to see that beauty is far beyond surface level things and that you through the cross delight in them you have cleaned them perfected them to present to yourself and all their glory is you have saved them through the cross I pray God that we would continue to grow in what it means to be men

And to be women as we follow after you in Jesus name amen

Raz Bradley 1/31/16 Raz Bradley 1/31/16

Do you even know how to sports, bro?

We all know the stereotype: the sports-loving, beer-drinking, thick-skinned man. But what about the rest of us? In a world where men are judged on whether or not they can throw a perfect spiral, what is masculinity actually about? What if being a man has little to do with how often you go hunting?

Transcript

Well, good morning. We are in week three of our Theology of Sex series. So we've been taking a look at kind of our culture and how we approach sex and how we think about sex and trying to really develop a theological basis for how we approach gender and sexuality and masculinity and femininity. And so our first week, we basically just said we were designed by God, created in the image of God, to worship God. And that human flourishing comes from our worship of God, but that we removed God from the place of creator and began to worship created things. And that since humans were made in the image of God, we're the easiest thing to swap out for God.

So we're most likely to believe that a relationship, that friendship, that another human will fill us up, make us complete, give us purpose. And that ultimately, that is where we have begun to place sexuality and romance in the place of God, and it's begun to wreak havoc on our culture. We wanted to then jump in and say, okay, here's what biblical masculinity is, and here's what biblical femininity is. Here's what God's design for women is. Here's what God's design for men is. But we couldn't because in our culture, there's even just a discussion about, is that really a thing?

Are there just women and men? Is it not on a sliding scale? Can't we just kind of choose or pick? Isn't there some form of? And so we had to just take time last week to discuss gender and to talk about the fact that God has created us male and female in his image. And there are two primary genders that are male and female, and we were designed by God to image him as male and female, and that ultimately, because we were made in the image of God, we were designed to get our worth and value from God, get our purpose from God.

And so once we'd begun to put romance and sex in the place of God, we then started using sex and romance to give us our purpose. And that's why we come alongside people. And as soon as they have a sexual urge or a romantic desire, we just come alongside of them and say, yeah, that's who you are. Because we've placed romance and sex in the place of God where we were designed to get our identity, and so we've begun to draw our identity from that. And so we spent some time looking at that last week. Today we are going to talk about masculinity, what it means to be a man.

Today, as God has designed it, if there are male and female and he intentionally designed us differently, then what does it mean to be a man? So jump to Genesis chapter 1. We're going to read something we've read several times. This is going to be Genesis chapter 1. It's on page 1. If your Bible looks like this, probably on page 1, no matter what your Bible looks like, because it's right at the beginning.

So Genesis chapter 1, go to verse 27. We're going to look at Genesis chapter 1, 27 and 28. So it says, God created man in his own image. That means mankind. In the image of God, he created him. Male and female, he created them.

So we've read this several times. It says God creating man and woman. He makes them in his image. And then it says 28. And God blessed them. And God said to them, Be fruitful and multiply.

Fill the earth and subdue it. And have dominion over the fish of the sea and over the birds of the heavens and over every living thing that moves on the earth. So God makes male and female in his image. And he says, It's your job to have dominion over the earth. And he makes them separate. So that there's a way that men are designed to carry out this call.

And there's a way that women are designed to carry out this call. But the calling has been given to both. To work together. To subdue and have dominion over the earth. And so what we're going to look at this week. Is what's the specific way men are designed to carry that out.

What are the core elements or pillars to masculinity. And next week we're going to look at what are the core elements or pillars to femininity. So. This is a vital question for us. I actually have become recently more interested in this question. Of what does it take to be a man?

What makes a man a man? Because I have a 10 month old son. He is male. But he is not a man. His primary disposition at this point is he just takes. He consumes.

He doesn't bring anything to the table. He's not carrying his weight. He doesn't weigh much. But he's not carrying his weight. Like he doesn't. He's not.

He's not doing anything. The best thing he has done so far is dance. And we've posted that. That's pretty much all we've gotten out of him. He doesn't do much. But it's my job and my wife's Job to raise him to be a man.

As he's growing up to tell him. No this is. This is what men do. Boys do that. This is what men do. This is what you're designed to be by God.

And so it's helpful for us to begin to get some vocabulary here. And our culture is all over the place. So we don't live in a culture where when you turn a certain age. Boom you're a man. We don't live in a culture where when you turn a certain age. We take all the boys.

And they have to climb a mountain. And if they make it back. They get to be a man. We don't have any kind of set. I'm a man now. You can walk up to guys that are 30 in our culture.

And say hey are you a man. And that actually has become a difficult question. I mean yeah. I mean what do you think. Like I. Sure.

I guess. Probably. How are we defining it. Male. Uh huh. Like it's just become more of a.

But if you walked up to your granddad. When he was 30. And said are you a man. That's a very silly question. Of course I am. Now get out of my face weirdo.

Like. Might would even just be a little bit offended. Like we. We've lost some of our. Definition. And in that void.

We've begun to add a whole bunch of things. So. What does it take to be a man. Are we going for. For James Bond. Like you need to drive nice cars.

Dress well. Be able to choke a guy out. In the bottom of a stairwell. Like what. What does it take to be a man. Do you have to.

Do you have to be intelligent. And know economics. And be able to run a company. Be able to. To. To quote.

Old dead guys. Who are smart. Do you. Is it just. The ability to grow a beard. And punch things.

Like is that. Our definition of man. Like if you can clean a fish. And a gun. You got it. Like really.

Is it just. Can I quote Chaucer. Or. Or should. Can I just. Is it.

Does back hair suffice. Like what's the category. I just need a high testosterone level. Like is that all we're going for. Maybe if I'm just always aggressive. Can I do that.

Like is that masculinity. And so we've begun to. To kind of. Lose. Our ability. So is it just sports.

Or is it sports knowledge. Athleticism. Is it. Something altogether different. And so. This is a.

Vital question. For our culture though. Because nobody. Is arguing. With any amount of data. People may be arguing this.

But with any amount of helpful data. Nobody's arguing. That the world is better. Where men are lacking. You can't make that argument. Psychologically.

You can't make it sociologically. You can't make it economically. You can't make it spiritually. The world was designed to have men. And where men are lacking. Things crumble.

You look at the places. With the highest poverty rates. The highest crime rates. What you'll find. Is a. Very vast amount.

Of fatherlessness. You'll find a giant void. Where dads haven't been dads. And they haven't shown. Boys how to be men. And other people in gangs.

And different things. Have come along. And said. This is what it takes to be a man. And begun to fill that void. We've got major problems.

In our. In our city right here. Where we've got. High amounts. Of. Single mothers.

That's a man problem. In our state. Which is. Top in the nation. In criminal domestic violence. That's a man problem.

Across the world. The most amount of. Rape culture. And heinous crimes. And violence. Are perpetrated by boys.

From the age of 20 to 60. And we need to have. A working. Functional. Healthy definition. Of what it takes to be a man.

So that we. Together as a church. Can begin to spot it. Can begin to encourage it. Can begin to point it out. Can walk up next to someone.

And say. Yes. That's man stuff right there. Keep doing that. That's great. And you can look at other people.

And say. That's boy stuff. Do what this guy was doing. Like we. We need to begin to have a language. So that we can raise sons.

To be men. So that we can grow together. As brothers in Christ. And be men. And. So.

Quick caveat. Before we hop in. Wives. If you're a wife in the room. And your husband is here. If you're a wife in the room.

And your husband is not here. Let me say this. Where the ideal. Is lacking. If you're. A single mother.

If you. Have a husband. But he has. Rejected this call. Where the ideal is lacking. Grace abounds.

So God has designed it. To be a certain way. But where the ideal is lacking. He steps in. He works on our behalf. And grace.

Abounds. So don't. Don't hear me say you are wrong. But you. Along with everybody else. Want men to be men.

So let's encourage that. Wives that are here. If your husband is here. A few quick things for you. Or if your husband's not here. A few quick things for you.

Listen. So that you can begin to spot this. And encourage it in your husband. Encourage it. Not angrily demand it. To spot it.

And encourage it. To be able to say. That's it. That's. That's. That's wonderful.

That's what you should be doing. You can begin to. Graciously expect it. Don't. Try to be the Holy Spirit. If we talk about something.

That your husband's not very good at. Just eyes up here. The Hulk just lock in. Don't do this. It's not going to help. Don't do this.

The subtle elbow thing. Don't. Don't do that. It's not going to help. It's. It's.

It's not productive. So just. Eyes up here. You stay focused. Let. Let the Holy Spirit do his job.

Single. Women. If you are. You're not. You don't have to get married. You don't.

That's not God's design for everybody. Perfectly fine and full way. To. To love Jesus and not be married. If you are dating and desire to be married. One of our goals.

Whenever we talk about masculinity. Is that some relationships. Would just fall all apart. The best way for some single females in this room. Is to. To leave here.

And break up with your boyfriend. That's the best way. For you to apply this sermon. To. To begin to expect. The person you're dating.

To actually be a man. And to not put up with childishness. And. And extended boyhood. Because it's not cute. Dating a boy who can shave.

Is not a good idea. Okay. Cool. Go break up with your boyfriend. Follow Jesus. He's better.

All right. I'm going to. I'm going to pray. And then we're going to hop in. And start reading some stuff from Genesis 2. Okay.

God. God. I pray that by your grace. Our. Church. Would be home to men.

Our church would be a place. Where the biologically male. Can by your grace. Be men. That we can. Challenge other men.

To be men. And to follow after you. And that we can get rid of some of the unhelpful stereotypes. And begin to actually place. Our understanding of masculinity. Firmly in what you say it is.

We love you. In Jesus name. Amen. All right. So the good news is.

God gives us some helpful. Handles on what masculinity is. So we're going to be in Genesis chapter 2. Now. We just read in Genesis 1. God makes male and female.

We're now going back. We're going ahead in the story to Genesis 2. But it's actually. Further back in time. This is. Retelling the story in a more colorful way.

This is prior to the existence of Eve. So we're going to start in verse 5. It'll be on page 2. If you're in this Bible. Probably somewhere close. In any other Bible.

Verse 5. Verse 6. When no bush of the field. Was yet in the land. And no small plant of the field. Had yet sprung up.

For the Lord God. Had not caused it to rain on the land. And there was no man. To work the ground. And a mist was going up from the land. It was watering the whole face of the ground.

Then the Lord God. Formed the man. Of dust. From the ground. And breathed into his nostrils. The breath of life.

And the man. Became a living creature. And the Lord God. Planted a garden. In Eden. In the east.

And there he put the man. Whom he had formed. And out of the ground. The Lord God. Made to spring up. Every tree that is pleasant.

To the sight. And good for food. And the tree of life. Was in the midst of the garden. And the tree of knowledge. Of good and evil.

And a river flowed out of Eden. To water the garden. And there it divided. And became four rivers. The name of the first. Is the Pishon.

It is the one that flowed. Around the whole land. To Havilah. Where there is gold. And the gold of that land. Is good.

Bedellum. And onyx stone. Are there. The name of the second river. Is the Gihon. It is the one.

That flowed around. The whole land of Cush. And the name of the third river. Is the Tigris. Which flows east of the Syria. And the fourth river.

Is the Euphrates. Okay. We just learned a lot about rivers. Push that out of your brain. We are not going to talk anything about that. The Lord God.

Took the man. And put him in the garden of Eden. To work it. And keep it. And the Lord God. Commanded the man.

Saying. For you shall surely eat. Of every tree of the garden. But of the tree of the knowledge. Of good and evil. You shall not eat.

For in the day that you eat. Of it. You shall surely die. Okay. God makes a man. Puts him in a garden.

He makes a garden. Puts the man in the garden. So the whole world is kind of. Rugged. Unkempt. He makes a garden.

Plants a garden. And then he puts the man in the garden. And he says he's got a job. He's to work it. And keep it. This is prior to sin.

This is prior to Eve. The man's designed to have a job. Single. Single men in the room. Masculinity does not wait. For you to get married.

And have children. Some of you are not called to be married and have children. You're going to be like Paul and Jesus. Who were perfectly masculine. And were not married and did not have kids. So don't feel like.

Oh cool. I get to be a boy until I have a wife who makes me be a man. That's nonsense. He gave him a job before the existence of Eve. So. He tells him to work it and keep it.

And from there we're going to look at everything we talk about today. So. Work and keep. We're going to take work and break it into two helpful ways to distinguish it. And then we're going to talk about keep it. The words we're going to use are cultivate.

Provide. And protect. Cultivate. Provide. And protect. That's what he means by work and keep.

That he had a job. He was to work and keep. He was to cultivate. To provide. And to protect. So.

Cultivate. God takes Adam. He puts him in this garden. And he says. Work it. Cultivate this.

Help it grow. And as he later talks to Adam and Eve. He says. Make the rest of the world look like this. There is a call in masculinity. To cultivation.

To development. To making things better. It's deep in us. It's the idea of being a craftsman. So that whether that's.

It's taking raw materials and turning it into something. So a chef. Takes raw ingredients. And turns it into something. Cook boss. He makes the prettiest cakes.

And that is distinctly masculine. Is how he takes raw materials. And turns them into. Like. I saw like this triple layer cake. With like a cherry tree on top.

And you could eat the whole thing. It was amazing. Art. Design. Web design. Landscaping.

Hardscaping. The ability to. To farm. And to build. And to take something. Raw materials.

And turn it into something. Is what we're called to do. Deep. Deep. It's one of the pillars of manhood. And we're supposed to do it.

Everywhere. We are designed. To cultivate. Which really just basically means. We leave it better. As men.

We leave it better. When you go to work. Your job. Is not to just do whatever you can. To skate by. And get a paycheck.

You are there. To cultivate. You are there. To make it better. To make your job better. For having had you work there.

If you live in a house. If you rent an apartment. That place should be better. For you having lived there. It shouldn't slowly decay. Under your care.

It should be. Cleaner. And nicer. And more taken care of. Because you were designed. To cultivate.

If you have relationships. You're designed. To cultivate. To help people grow. To develop them. To take something.

And nurture it. And give it health. And life. So. Husbands. Your wife.

You're supposed to cultivate her. She should flourish. Under your headship. And under your leadership. And under your care. That you would go out of your way.

To help bring out. What is best in her. If you have roommates. And you're going to live with them. For a year. Or two years.

Or three years. You should be. Building into them. They should be better off. For having lived with you. They should look back.

On that time. And say. It was. It was good. And formative. And God's grace.

Towards me. That I lived with you. With this man. Because he. Cultivated me. They might not use that word.

Because that would be weird. Built into me. Challenged me. It's the way. It's the way we're designed to work. This is why guys can do.

Any little bit of a sport. And then go buy. Two hundred dollars worth of equipment. Because you're like. Wouldn't it be better if we had this? Oh this would be way better if we had that.

This is why you. You can't. You play a game. And you immediately go. Oh. I wish this game had this thing.

Because we're designed. To try to make things better. To try to cultivate. To try to bring out life. One of the people I have seen do this the best in my life was my dad. At all points he was working to make everything around him better.

He didn't sit still much. He can walk into. You can walk around with him. If you go stay in a hotel. If you go to a theme park. And after he's been there a couple of hours.

You can say. Okay. What could they do to make this better? And immediately. That's all he's been thinking about. Well they could do this.

If they'd have done 30 minutes more worth of work there. That would look twice as good. Like he. He does that. It drives my wife crazy. But Phillips is.

Change the rules to board games. We'll play a game once. And go. Okay. Next time. These are the new rules.

My wife's like. Why would you change the rules? Because it'll make the game better. That rule was dumb. We have whole sides of dice. That don't even mean anything.

It's like. No. If you roll that. You just do this. We're not doing that anymore. Throw those cards away.

That's not part of the game. Like we just. One of the ways my dad did this in us. Was he was always moving us towards manhood. So you were like five.

And my mom maybe cooked something you didn't like. And you were like. I don't. I'm not going to eat it. It's just. It's not going to happen.

I just. I just hate it. And my dad would look at you. And go. Hey. Boy.

Look at me. You going to grow up to be a man? Yes sir. The answer to that was always yes. You weren't like. I don't know what I'm thinking about.

And my dad asked you that. I said yes sir. He said okay. What if I came home. And your mom cooked something. That I didn't like.

And I walked over and said. I'm not going to eat it. And immediately. This was the most grotesque thing. You could ever see. Because my dad.

Throwing a fit. It's just ugly. You shouldn't see grown men. Throw whiny fits. So you're five.

And you were like. No. You should never do that. And he's like. Right. Come on.

And it was like. Okay. But he would help you see. Something that was happening. When you were five. That was going to.

Like you. You'd be afraid of something. Hyperventilating. Freaking out. I can't ride. I just can't get on this ride.

I can't get on this roller coaster. And he would look at you. And go. Hey. Look at me. You're seven years old.

Look at me. You want to have a wife and kids someday? That's a really heavy question. For a seven year old. Answer. Yes sir.

Like you just. You go. All right. Let me ask you a question. You're asleep. Sound asleep.

You hear a crash. Someone broke into your house. Are you going to go. Or are you going to do what you got to do? It's like. I did not know roller coasters had anything to do.

With burglaries. He's like. Hey. Get control of yourself. Let's go.

And it was like. Okay. I can ride a roller coaster. Because I don't want my kids to die. But here's what my dad was doing.

And sometimes he over applied that. And it got really intense and crazy over things that probably shouldn't have been. But what he was doing is. When you plant. Like if you plant a tomato plant. You go ahead and put that like weird green thing.

The cage around it. Why? Because it's going to grow. You have. You already have a plan for what it's going to do. You know what the goal is.

You're going to get tomatoes off this thing. My dad was looking at us when we were five. And saying. Your goal isn't to be a five-year-old. Your goal is to be a man. And I'm going to cultivate you.

To do that. And as men. That's our job. With everything. Under our care. We leave it better.

Something deep inside of you. Is calling you. To work. To cultivate. To cultivate. And the question isn't.

Are you cultivating? The question is. What are you cultivating? Because something is getting your energy. Something is getting your time. You are waking up and doing something.

Are you cultivating death? Are you cultivating laziness? Are you cultivating harm for others? Are you actually working towards something that's valuable and good and will last? So God took Adam.

He placed him in the garden. And told him to work. Half of that's cultivate. The other half is provide. So men are designed to cultivate.

They're designed to develop. To build. To be craftsmen. And designed to provide. And provision just means this. It's a couple of really simple things.

Off the bat. Have a job. You're supposed to work. Men are supposed to go to bed tired. You're supposed to. God designed it that we would work six days and rest one.

So if you want to say one day a week you can go to bed feeling rested. Go for it. Six days out of the week you need to go to bed tired. You should have a sore back. Some sore feet. Your brain should ache.

You should have been at work. If you're at school. Go to school. Work. Work at school. Get another Job.

Cultivate your friends. Don't think I only got two hours of stuff to do today. And I don't have to do anything on Tuesdays and Thursdays. No you're designed to work. To provide. It means you have a job.

It means if you have a job. Have a budget. To plan ahead. So the provision. When God put him there and said. Make this flourish.

Make this grow. He was to design everything so that it could flourish. So he was supposed to have systems for economics. He was supposed to have systems for when they harvest. When they don't harvest. He was supposed to have systems and design and plans.

For how this works. My wife grew up in Johnston. The peach capital of the world. So take that Georgia. Just because you called the name. Doesn't count.

When I'm riding down to go see. We go visit her dad or something. You're riding and there's like trees and stuff. And it's just woods. And then all of a sudden you'll. You just open up and there's just rows.

Of peaches. Peach trees. They're organized. Do you know why? Because they had a plan. They were designing this.

They were figuring out a way for it to best provide. There's never like peaches. And then cotton underneath. And a few rows of corns going this way. Like it doesn't make any sense. Like we're supposed to figure out and set up systems and provide.

And make ways for things to grow and develop and be healthy. So I just. Girls if you're dating a guy. And he has a budget. That's awesome. You should be excited.

If he's like. I can't do that right now. Budget's kind of tight. You should be like. Wait. You got a spreadsheet?

He'd be like. Yeah. And you'd be like. That's man stuff right there. This means that we as men are designed to do the hard work so that others can benefit. We're designed to do hard work so that others can benefit.

It also means that we go last. Your goal isn't to get the best parking spot if you can walk. You walk. Let other people have the good parking spot. If you're hanging out with your community group and y'all are throwing a party. That means you're going to show up and help provide some of the food.

You're going to show up and help provide some of what's there. And you're going to stay late and help clean up. It means if you and your family just had a baby. You're taking the worst shift at night. You're going to find a way for your wife to sleep. You've got work to do.

You're going to be the one who's tired. You're going to make sure everyone else has what they need first. If you have a roommate and y'all are both hungry. And there's only one Totino's pizza left. Your roommate gets it. And you figure out something else.

Or you go hungry. Because that's man stuff. We go last. We make sure everyone else around us has what they need. We provide what is necessary. We do the hard work so that other people can have this.

This means that we save money for the benefit of others. Some guys it means that you need to take on a roommate. Even though you don't need one. Because maybe they need one. And you'd have the opportunity to cultivate. To pour into them.

To help develop them. Doesn't mean. That your wife can't make more money than you. It just means it's not her job to. She's not the one who's tasked with providing for your family. Recently in my community group.

There was a guy named Jack. Who became a Christian last year. It was really an encouraging thing. As he began to follow Jesus. And his wife got sick. And they just had a baby.

And so they decided it was best for her to not be working. Because of some of the sickness. And some of them having a kid. And so you know what he did? He took on another Job. He gets up at 5 o'clock in the morning.

He goes to work at 6. He works till 2. When he gets off at 2. He goes to his other Job. He works till 9 or 10. When he's not at work.

He's helping watch the kid. He doesn't get to hang out with our group as much. Because he's always at work. And that's beautiful. We try to find ways to get around him. We try to find ways to hang out with him.

But that's what he's designed to do. Is to provide. To work. One of the primary things that distinguishes a boy from a man. Is that a boy's primary way they relate to the world. Is they take.

But men give. If you are dating guys. If you are dating men. Not if you're dating men. Men if you're dating. Stay focused.

You're either going to leave. The woman you are dating. Better. Or worse. For having dated you. You are either going to provide.

For her to flourish. You're either going to help cultivate her. Or you are going to take from her. And if your goal in dating someone. Is to. To see them naked.

To get to have sex with them. To get to. Partake from them. To get to. They exist for your benefit. That's boy stuff.

That's not what men do. You're designed. To cultivate. To protect. To provide. And to make everything around you better.

This also means. That you can't just be. Provision isn't just. Well I make sure that the bills are paid. And I make sure there's food on the table. If your wife is physically fed.

But spiritually famished. You're not providing. You're not setting up the systems. You were designed to set up. If you have a daughter. Who drives a Mercedes.

But doesn't know you. And you never pursue her. I can tell you one thing. We could line up. All the girls at the University of South Carolina. And we could say.

See some whose dad worked two and three jobs. And scraped by. To buy a beater car off a Craigslist. But pursued their daughters. Loved their daughters. Talked to their daughters.

And we could have some that. Their dad gave them everything they ever wanted. Except for him. And I'll tell you what. The ones with the beater cars. Wouldn't trade their dad in for a Mercedes.

And the ones with the Mercedes. Would trade it every time. You're designed to set up. A system to provide. And to cultivate. Those around you.

I heard one pastor put it this way. I thought it was helpful. This is specifically for guys who are married and have kids. When you go to work. That's first shift. When you come home from work.

You are not off work. You are starting second shift. Second shift is where you save your wife from your children. And on some days. Your children from your wife. But it's your job to be around your kids.

To roll around on the floor. To assault them in a healthy way. When your kids go to sleep at eight, nine o'clock. You're not off work. Third shift just started. It's time for you to talk to your wife.

It's time for you to pursue her. It's time for you to discuss with her. It's time for you. And you say okay. And then what happens? Well you probably go to sleep.

Because you're exhausted. What about me time? Wake up at four in the morning. That's me time. Or you don't get any. That's how that works.

You were designed to work. And to go to bed tired. Okay. Got to move on. Protect. So he says work it and keep it.

Work it. We talked about in cultivate and provide. Keep it. He means to defend it. The word there is like to be a shield. To protect what you have.

We as men are designed to protect. And universally this one is understood as manly. As what men are supposed to do. We don't have much push back on the idea of protection. In 2012 at a movie theater in Aurora, Colorado. At a midnight showing of the dark night.

A man walked in in a trench coat. Wearing a flak jacket. Threw out some gas canisters. Smoke canisters. And began to take an assault rifle and fire into the crowd. In that showing were two young men with their girlfriends.

Who pushed their girlfriends to the ground. And laid their bodies on top of them. Bullets ripped through their bodies and into their girlfriends. Their girlfriends were wounded. And both of those young men died. Worldwide they were heralded as heroes.

Because we understand that's what's supposed to happen. Men are supposed to take the fall so that others can go free. They're supposed to stick their necks out on behalf of others. That same year there was a, in Europe off the coast of Italy, there was a boat that sank. And there were reports that men were pushing women and children out of the way to get to the life rafts first. Universally, that was called heinous cowardice.

Because we know deep inside of us that men are designed to take a beating on behalf of others. Men are designed to take punishment on behalf of others. There's a seminary professor and I heard this story. He teaches his sons. He's got some sons. And he teaches them that boys take the fall so the girl can go free.

Boys take the fall so the girl can go free. And he teaches them this all the time. And he was in his office and he was watching his son riding a wagon down a hill. Hill. Watching him ride a wagon down a hill. And just completely out of control.

And so at this point there's nothing he can do but watch. He's just like, okay, let's see how badly this goes for him. And so the kid's just losing it, careening down this hill. And as he's getting towards the bottom, a girl about two years younger than his son, his son was younger at the time, comes riding out on a tricycle. And so he's like, okay, this just got worse. And he's watching his son.

His son starts rocking the cart back and forth as best he can. And just tips the whole thing over. And just makes it ten times worse. Just goes barreling down this hill. I mean, smacking his body, rolling. And his dad jumps up and immediately runs outside.

Knows that this is one of those, like, are we going to the hospital type moments. Runs up to his son. His son's bleeding and crying. He looks at him and goes, I did it, Dad. The boy takes the fall. The girl goes free.

And 100,000 times yes. That is what men are designed to do. We're designed to take a beating on behalf of others. Real practically. Periodically. This means periodically we'll hear noises at my house.

And the other night I heard a loud noise and I rolled over and tapped my wife. And I said, hey, you know how I'm really progressive and I don't try to hold you back. She said, yeah, boo. She's real sweet when I wake up at night. And I said, do you hear that noise? And she said, yeah, it's your turn.

Go defend the baby. No, that doesn't happen. I don't care if your wife is an army ranger with a black belt. You hear a noise, that's your job. Cover me. I got it.

I work IT. Somebody's going down. Like, I mean, that's just how it works. It's your job. Men are designed by God to protect. Now, this doesn't have anything to do with stature.

This doesn't have anything to do with testosterone levels. This doesn't have anything to do with what kind of Job you work. None of those do. We're designed to cultivate. We're designed to provide. And we're designed to protect.

We leave it better. We do the hard work so that others can benefit. And we go last. And we take the fall so others can go free. That's what masculinity is. That's what we're designed to do.

That's what God put Adam there to do. And then chapter 3 happens of Genesis. And in chapter 3, I'm just going to tell you this story and we'll look at a few verses. Chapter 3. It says, it tells us the story of a snake comes up. So Eve's there at this point.

A snake comes up and starts talking to Eve. Now, let's go ahead and give them a little bit of credit. Because first of all, you're like, snake talks to me. Situation is over. This was before sin. So they hadn't been tricked before.

They hadn't been harmed before. So, of course, snake talks to you. Right. You're getting out of there. But let's just give them some benefit of the doubt.

They didn't realize how really messed up the situation had just gotten. Snake talks to Eve and begins to lie to her about what God said. And tricks her into the verse we read earlier where God says, don't eat of this tree. Tricks her and deceives her into eating of the tree. And then the Bible says something absolutely crazy. Flip to Genesis chapter 3.

I want us to look at verse 6. Verse 6. This whole story is playing out of this conversation between Eve and the snake. And verse 6 says, So when the woman saw that the tree was good for food, and that it was a delight to the eyes, and that the tree was to be desired to make one wise, she took of its fruit and ate, and she also gave some to her husband who was with her, and he ate. That's the first time he shows up in the story. He was there the whole time.

He absolutely abdicated what he was supposed to do. He absolutely backed out of his call to cultivate her, his call to provide for her, and mostly to protect her. He was just there. Then it says that this was sin, and this is what immediately caused a rift between them and between God. And then God shows up in the garden, and he calls for Adam. He's not looking for Eve.

He's looking for Adam. And then Adam, as God begins to question him about this situation, Adam says this in verse 12. The man said, The woman whom you gave to be with me, she gave me fruit of the tree, and I ate. That's his response. It was the woman that you gave me. I think we can clearly see I had nothing to do with this.

And we immediately, in chapters 3, see three of the biggest issues when it comes to us living out biblical masculinity, our apathy, sinful aggression, and blame. Apathy. He was there, but he just didn't do anything. We were hanging out with our community group the other day, and my son, who's walking and tearing everything up all the time, was over in somebody else's house tearing stuff up. And so my wife got up and went and picked him up and took care of him, and then she walked over and handed him to her husband, who was with her. And that was the first time I showed up in that story.

Because of apathy. I just didn't want to get up. Because this is at work in me, and it's at work in all of us. And then sinful aggression. When Adam should have been aggressive towards the snake, he takes out his aggression by blaming others. It was her fault.

The one time he actually shows a little bit of some of the aggression God gave him that he should have used in a helpful way. It's only an aggression at those around him, not to help them, but to harm him. So the two major sin issues that we'll see in masculinity is apathy, where men just abdicate the role they were given, or when they wrongfully use their aggression and their size to domineer over others. And the third one is blame. It's not my fault. It was the woman's fault.

I mean, it's not me. It's my boss. It's not me. It's these daggum kids I got. If I'd have just had a different father, if I could have just gone to school, if I'd have just had that kind of Job, man, if I'd had that kind of money growing up, it's not my fault. The one that's the most bizarre to me but gets used so often is we blame our apathy.

Man, I don't know. I'm just apathetic. I would have done that, but, you know, I just, I don't know. I just don't, I don't feel like it. I don't have the energy. Like, that's a valid excuse.

And here's what I know about Adam. Here's what I know about us. You swap out any man in this room for Adam, this story plays out. At some point, we all get kicked out of the garden. At some point, we all abdicate our role. At some point, we fail to cultivate, provide, and protect.

None of us stay in the garden. Romans 5. Thankfully to God, that's the first bit of the book, and it keeps going. Romans chapter 5 is going to be on page 612. We're going to start with verse 12. Therefore, just as sin came into the world through one man, who'd sin come through?

Adam. Who ate the fruit first? Eve. Who gave it to Adam? Eve. Who talked to the snake?

Eve. Who'd sin come through? Adam. Because of his apathy. Because of his failure to do what God had designed him to do. Therefore, just as sin came into the world through one man, and death through sin, and so death spread to all men because all sinned.

This sin of Adam has spread to all of us and ultimately leads to death, but is working death in us all of the days of our lives. For sin indeed was in the world before the law was given, but sin is not counted where there is no law. Yet death reigned from Adam to Moses, even over those whose sinning was not like the transgression of Adam, who was of type of the one who was to come. Okay, so Adam prefigured someone else who was going to come. He was a type of someone else to come. But the free gift is not like the trespass.

For if many died through one man's trespass, so Adam brings death to everybody, much more have the grace of God and the free gift by the grace of that one man, Jesus Christ, abounded for many. And the free gift is not like the result of the one man's sin. For the judgment following one trespass, which is sin, brought condemnation, but the free gift following many trespasses brought justification. It means he made us right. For if because of one man's trespass, death reigned through that one man, much more will those who receive the abundance of grace and the free gift of righteousness reign in life through the one man, Jesus Christ.

Jesus perfectly fulfilled masculinity on our behalf. He was the better Adam. Where Adam apathetically stood by and didn't help, Jesus steps into a situation that was not his to fix, but only he could fix, and he steps in to make everything better. Jesus perfectly, where Adam was passive when he should have been aggressive and aggressive when he should have been humble and passive, Jesus was the opposite. Perfectly walking aggression and gentleness out, perfectly loving and pursuing and fighting against the real enemy, sin and death. And where Adam failed to protect, where Adam at the end pointed at his wife and said, it's her fault, put her head on the chopping block.

She should be the one to blame. Jesus stepped in and said, it's their fault. It's Adam's fault. It's your fault. Put my head on the chopping block. I'll be the one to blame.

Jesus is the ultimate man who took the fall so that we could go free and perfectly fulfilled masculinity for us and perfectly walked it out and showed us what it looks like to cultivate, to provide, and to protect. He did everything on the cross that Adam failed to do. He did everything on the cross that we failed to do. And our options as men, you're either in Adam, either have death at work in you, or you're in Christ, where you have life at work in you through Jesus' work on your behalf. You either have Adam's work on your behalf and your work joined in with him, or you have Jesus' work on your behalf that overcomes all the terrible work we've ever done.

And through Jesus, we can actually be men. Not to say that Christians can't be masculine. Not to say that men who don't know Jesus can't fulfill some of these things. But it'll never be complete. It'll never be fulfilled. And we'll be consistently looking for something to make sure that we have value.

Consistently looking for something to make sure that... I'm a real man because I can pick stuff up and put it down. I'm a real man because I got a good job that makes money. I'm a real man because I know how to shoot a deer. I'm a real man because I don't care about all those stereotypes. And I'm secure in my own mask.

Like, whatever. We'll begin to use that to put others down and to raise us up. Just like Adam looked at Eve and said, put her down, raise me up. She's the problem. As long as you see her as the issue, I get to be okay. And Jesus does the opposite where he takes the blame on our behalf, where he takes the fall so we can go free.

And in Christ, we can actually be made into real men. So by God's grace, this is what we're pursuing here. To be men who know that Jesus is the real man. Jesus is the one who works life in us, who paid for our sin and our debt and makes us actually able to be men. And then as we follow Jesus and as we fail, we trust in Jesus. But as we follow Jesus, we work to cultivate and to provide and to protect.

And we work to call men to be men here. And by God's grace, we will work and fight and go out exhausted. We'll go to sleep tired and then one day, we'll close our eyes and take our last breath, absolutely worn out, strung out, exhausted from living our life for the sake of others. Pouring ourselves out for the benefit of others, working hard, going out with our boots on because we've been at work. And we've been protecting and providing and cultivating just as God called us to. And everywhere we failed, we just leaned into Jesus who perfectly did it on our behalf.

That's our desire here. To have men, to train men, to turn boys into men, to take our sons and make them men and to follow Jesus the whole time. The band's going to come back up and play and we're going to sing. Men, where we've been failing at this, where we've been apathetic, where we've been blaming others, where we've been wrongfully exerting aggression on those around us to control our situation and make ourselves look better, we need to repent. We need to repent to those that we've harmed. Single men, you need to realize that while married men have a clear and direct example of those that they are harming through their apathy because their wife or their children walk around with them on a regular basis.

Just because you are single and the people that you are harming through your apathy don't follow you around, you're still called to cultivate. You're still called to make those around you better. You're still called to be active in what it means to be a man. And all of us are called to repent and to point to Jesus because when Adam looked around in the garden and said, someone has to take the blame for this, he just knew that he couldn't handle the weight of his own failure and he looked around and said, someone takes the blame and thousands of years later Jesus stepped forward. When Adam looked at God and said, it's your fault, Jesus in Christ says, yes, I'll take that.

I'll take the blame even though I don't deserve it and he stepped up and took the blame for us and so when we fail, we get to look at Jesus who's already taken the blame on our behalf, who's already taken the weight on our behalf and we get to repent, confess and know that Jesus ultimately handled it and we get to follow him and what real masculinity looks like. God, we pray that by your grace, males would be men, that we would love and serve and protect those around us, that we would humbly sacrifice and lead. God, we pray that we would cultivate, that everything around us would be better because we were there, because you were at work in us. God, we pray that we would put others first, that we would put ourselves last, that we would do hard work for the benefit of others.

God, we pray that you would help us to take the fall so others can go free and to stick our necks out for the sake of others. That you would work in us to perfectly cultivate, provide and protect. And God, I pray that we would follow after you, leaning into you and our failures and that the men in this room who have lived their life in Adam would place their faith in Jesus to be set free from all their failures because you took the blame for us, to be made new and that we might follow you as men. I pray that the women in our church family would encourage men to be men, would point it out, would welcome it.

I pray that the ladies in this room that are dating guys would not put up with boys that can shave but would follow after the true man, Jesus, until he brings along a man following after him. God, we ask for your grace and your work on our behalf. Pray that men will repent and follow you. In Jesus' name, Amen.

Raz Bradley 1/17/16 Raz Bradley 1/17/16

Life, Liberty, and the Pursuit of Romance

As Americans we are convinced that the point of life is happiness. Through movies, advertising, and music our culture has told us that the primary avenue to happiness is romance. But what if happiness is too small of a goal? What do we do when both happiness and romance fail us?

Transcript

Well, good morning. We're about to have some fun for the next several weeks. So, we are going to be starting this the first week in our Theology of Sex series, and we're just going to take some time to look at gender and sexuality because, really, it's a big issue for us. It's a big issue for every culture, questions that you have to answer, and we're just kind of all over the map right now as a culture. So, let me give you just a quick kind of, here's where we're headed. Next week, we're actually going to spend some time just talking about gender.

Is it a social construct? Is there more depth and meaning to it than that? Or is it fluid? Like, we're just going to spend some time looking at what the Bible has to say about it. Next, the following week, we're going to talk about masculinity. So, what is it that makes you a man?

What is it that makes a man a man? Is it the ability to fix a truck and grow a beard? Or is it, should we throw off all of those kind of stereotypes about being able to do push-ups? And is it something completely different? Or is that just socially engineered as well? Is there actually something deep and real in masculinity given to us in Scripture?

So, we're going to look at that. Then, the following week, we'll be in femininity, looking at what it means to be a woman. And so, we'll have a man up here opening the Bible, teaching about what it means to be a woman. So, that should go really well. The purpose and God-given design for womanhood and femininity, especially with how much pressure is placed on women in our culture. We're just going to see what the Bible says that's supposed to look like.

Then, we'll go into the purpose of sex. Is it whatever you want it to be? Is it just for fun? Is it just for the propagation of humanity? Is that the only reason it exists? Or is there something deeper, more real to it?

And then, we'll talk about marriage, specifically American understanding of a marriage versus God's understanding of marriage. Is marriage primarily for fulfillment, for you being happy? Is it primarily to keep society going? We'll spend some time there. Then, we're going to talk about intolerance, bigotry, and hospitality when it comes to the church. And so, we should have a very good time, I think, as we walk through this.

We will definitely say some offensive things. The Bible is offensive to all of us. But before we get into all the really offensive things, all the stuff that we all have a lot of questions about, a lot of tension over, we're going to have to lay a foundation. We're going to have to lay a framework for us to even understand how we're supposed to view sexuality, how we're supposed to view gender, how we can even begin to approach this topic. We've got to lay the groundwork for our ability to even walk onto that playing field. Because we're going to come from very different places.

And so, we have to say, here's how we're approaching it from a biblical standpoint. And so, our culture and us, we like love stories. We like romance. We place a lot of value there. It's the stories we tell. That's what Disney has made tons and tons of money off of telling us love stories.

And even in the movies we watch, like if people start off not married, the movie ends with a wedding. And that's it. It's like, they say they're, like, sometimes you don't even have to hear what they say. They just run out and someone throws rice at their face and then credits. And you're like, oh, magic. Like, they ride away in a little carriage.

Like, I was watching Cinderella recently. And, and... Was that weird? Was that a weird thing to say? Anna, my wife, likes those movies. So, I watched them periodically with her.

And it was, like, destroying my soul as I watched that. Look, I can watch Cinderella. We're going to talk about masculinity in a couple of weeks. Don't throw your... No, I'm just kidding. All right.

Stereotypes on me. All right. They, they, I think, if I'm correct with Cinderella, though, they meet at the ball. They dance a couple of times. He chases her down. Her shoe, her foot fits in the shoe.

Obviously the same woman, because that's how feet work. He didn't recognize her face. It was just based off of the foot. Then it says they get, they get married. They're riding off in a carriage. And it's, like, happily ever after.

And I'm like, this is, like, their first conversation. That carriage ride is super awkward. Like, this is... And who knows, really? Like, they don't know each other at all. There's just, we tell these stories.

But, like, I'm going to share a few, just, these kind of stories. Because we, we find them compelling. We, we enjoy sharing them. I got a few from just my family. So I'm going to tell you how my grandparents on both sides and my parents met.

My grandparents on my dad's side met as a part of the same church. And began to date. It was right before World War II or during World War II. And my granddad was, had been through, I believe boot camp was about to be shipping out. But they started dating.

When they started dating, my grandmother told him, she said she didn't want to kiss anybody until she got married. Like, that, her wedding day would be her first kiss. And my granddad was like, yeah. That sounds great. I'm totally for that. That sounds wonderful.

And then he was like, but what if we just tried to see how close we could get our faces together without kissing? And apparently, like, talked my grandmother into it. She was like, okay, I don't think why that would be bad. Then he was like, like, they accidentally kissed. And he was like, oops. Since that happened, do you want to do that some more?

And that's like the only story I know about them dating that my grandmother just told me one time randomly. And I was like, I don't know how I feel about that story. Weirded out. Kind of proud of my granddad. Like, I don't know how to have an emotional reaction to this. But then he, they got married like a week before he shipped out to go overseas to World War II.

My other grandparents, my mom's side, my granddad was in medical school. My grandmother was, had just finished nursing school. They were doing, like, rotation or training at the same hospital. My granddad wasn't dating anybody because he felt called to go be a missionary, a foreign missionary. And so he was going to go be a medical missionary. And he just wasn't dating anybody because he didn't want to, that, to get weird.

He felt like this is what he was supposed to do. And my grandmother really wanted a family, children. Like, she really felt like that was something that was supposed to be. Like, she just desired it. But she also felt called, even from a young age, to be a foreign missionary.

And so she just one day was really wrestling with this. And she was praying. And she said, okay, God, I'll go. I'll go be a single missionary forever. I'll never have a husband and children and all that if that's not for me. If that's not what you want me to do, I submit.

I surrender. I'll do this. At the same time, my granddad was eating dinner. While she's praying through this in her, like, dorm room or how she lived with a couple other ladies, she, my granddad was eating dinner and having a conversation. And it came up. They never really dated anybody.

And he just said, I want to be a foreign missionary, so I'm not going to get into any relationships. And somebody was like, oh, there's a nurse around here that she's going to be a foreign missionary. And he was like, phone number. She comes out of the room from praying. And they're like, you got a phone call. It was my granddad.

He was like, you want to go on a date? Because you want to go to another country. And so do I. And that's why don't we just maybe go to the country together. And so that was how they met, started talking, started dating, and ended up being missionaries to Nigeria. My parents, last one.

My parents, my dad's, my granddad on my dad's side was a pastor. So my mom was hanging out at that church because she went to school near that area where he was a pastor. And my dad saw my mom, thought she was cute. So he walked over to his mom, kind of in the vicinity of, I think maybe his mom and my mom were talking. Walked over to his mom, put his arm around her and kissed her on the cheek and said, I just want to tell you how much I love you. And then just walked away.

And my mom's first thought about my dad was, if he's that nice to his mom, I wonder how nice he'll be to his wife. And it was all a trick. But there's just something compelling to us about romance, about relationships, about, there's something, they hold promise for us. Whenever anybody enters into a new relationship, there's just this, I don't know, I don't know how this is going to work out. There's just all these, like, it could just be so, and we have so many beliefs that our culture gives us about relationships and about sexuality and about love and about romance that are just pumped into our brains all the time.

Even without us really paying attention to it. I was riding the other day, I was been working on this and I had like a five minute car ride. And the first song I heard when I got in the car, listen to it, Steve FM or whatever, like random radio. The first song I heard was, don't hand me no lines and keep your hands to yourself. If you're familiar with that song, it's a guy trying to get a girl to have sex with him and she doesn't want to until they're married. And that's the whole point of the song.

So high quality music there. And then the next one was the I'm at a payphone waiting for you. I've spent all my money trying to call you that song. Do you know what I'm talking about? I'm at a payphone waiting for you. That one, okay.

So I listened to that and he's, yeah, you're right. I should sing up here more often. And then the third one was Funky Comodina, which I'm not going to describe to you. But if you know it, all three of these songs, and this is what I'm riding around. I don't know all of them. I'm singing, you know, like Funky Comodina, like I'm riding around.

And this is what we're pumping into our brains all the time. I mean, there's just so much, we're being told so many stories, so many things to believe. There's just so much given to us. And honestly, it begins to just seep into us. And we really need to take a second and pull back and look at the big picture and ask this question. This is what we're looking at today.

We're going to see why this is so compelling to us. Why love stories, why this idea of people coming together, why romance, why it's such a big deal, why it really foundationally, fundamentally, even in scriptures, so compelling, and why it can be absolutely harmful and devastating. And just, if it gets in the wrong place, destructive. And so that's what we're going to spend some time doing. Now, we're going to get to talking about sex, but we've got to lay the groundwork first. So go to Genesis chapter 1.

All the way left in your Bible. It's on page 1. If your Bible looks like this, it's absolutely page 1, because it doesn't even say page 1 on it. You're going to have to find page 2 and go back a page. I'm going to pray, and then we're going to start at the very beginning of everything in the Bible and see kind of how we can lay a framework for how we ought to view this, why romance weighs so heavily on us, and why it can be so destructive. God, we thank you that you don't leave us on our own to figure this out, that really heavy, difficult, life-changing, heartfelt issues, like gender, like sexuality, like marriage, aren't left up to us, aren't left up to popular opinion.

God, I know that what you say and what we're going to see as we study through this over the next couple months is the opposite in a lot of ways of what we believe as a culture and honestly is in some ways offensive, I think, to everybody. I think we'll be surprised to see who and how we get offended as we walk through this, God. But I just pray that your Holy Spirit would work, that you would make us receptive to your Word, and that this morning you'd help us lay a framework and a foundation for how we're going to approach the rest of this. We love you and we praise you in Jesus' name. Amen. Amen.

All right, Genesis chapter 1, verse 1. This is the very beginning of the Bible. In the beginning. Seems like a good place to start. In the beginning, God created the heavens and the earth. Okay, stop.

At the very onset of Scripture, we are met with a very powerful God. Francis Schaeffer, who's a theologian, says that this may be the most pregnant sentence in all of humanity. It's just absolutely so full of depth, bursting forth with life, that we can just miss it. So it says, In the beginning, God. God exists prior to existence. He exists prior to the beginning of everything.

Like, everything we do is time-based, time-bound. I saw, I see, I went, I run, Johnny runs, Johnny ran, Johnny goes, Johnny went, go, Johnny, go, go, go. Like, we, we, everything is, and God is prior to that. There's no way to even, just to describe it. He's prior to the word prior. Like, before our ability to say before.

He exists outside of time. In the beginning, God exists, and then he creates the heavens and the earth. God, out of nothing, out of himself, really, creates everything. So everything we have, created by God. So prior to existence, there was God.

This is what we're told in the Bible. And then, God, out of nothing, creates everything. And so, when Anna and I first moved here, we got, we bought a house, well, we rent it from the bank. And, we, it was like, oh, cool, it's finally our own spot. Like, we're out of apartments, this is going to be nice. And then, I didn't realize what this was going to do to my wife.

So as soon as we get a house, she's like, wouldn't it be nice if, like, she starts so many sentences that way now. And it's like, wouldn't it be, oh, shit, what if we got some carpet? What if we build a fence? What if we, like, it's all these things. And it's like, yeah, that sounds great. And then, every time though, we ask the follow-up question, how much is that going to cost?

We have a discussion where we look at our budget, and then we say things like, maybe next year. Like, unless it's like, wouldn't it be nice if we had another trash, can? Most of the time, it's like, maybe next year. Like, we have to, God doesn't have to do that. He, infinite power and wealth, like, he, out of his own riches, out of his own glory, he creates everything. And it says, he creates the heavens and the earth.

So heavens there has an S. This is written through a biblical author who is empowered by the Holy Spirit. So he's writing about something he has no idea about. At this point, all he really could do is like, look up, and then if he wanted to see a little better, he could squint. Like, that's all he had. And he's saying heavens, which is the explanation of what we now know is infinite space.

Like, we can't, we don't know if it's infinite, because we can't see the end of it. We're just like, it just seems to keep going. It seems like everything gets bigger. Every time we shine a telescope to the darkest spot of the sky, and then we just wait some years for it to catch light, we're like, oh wow, there's a whole bunch of other stuff. All we know is that there's galaxies and galaxies, and solar system and solar system, and in the middle of this, not very impressive galaxy, in the middle of this not very impressive solar system, there's this tiny little oddly shaped earth that God creates.

And when we originally started space exploration, we had like four criteria for what it would take to have a habitable planet. And we were like, oh, we're going to find tons. Let's go. And so we started looking, and then it started, it slowly grew from four criteria to over 200 now, and we're starting to look at the statistics and going, I don't know if we're going to find another one. And then people respond with, well, yeah, but there's so many planets, there's got to be some. But what we see is that statistically, earth gets off a degree or two, it gets a little too far away from sun, a little too close to the sun, like there's not much that's in between us, and melting, or imploding, or exploding, or freezing, like we're right in the little, the sweet spot for humans to exist on a tilt, that we didn't realize that was important, and then we found out, oh no, actually if it was like a degree one, two the other way, we'd be in trouble.

We're the only planet we know of that sits on an awkward axis like that. And, and so we started saying, well, it seems like this is true. It's, it's logical to say, all right, I see in scripture that it says there's a God who made the heavens, and then he made an earth, and he's playing out this story on this earth, and it seems like it's, it's at least logical. Now, you can say, well, okay, but, but in infinite space, in infinite time, with infinite multiverses, and all of the galaxies, like at some point, yeah, I see, you got to hit it, like, there's going to be a planet, and people say that, but we don't use that argument for other things.

So, if you were in the old west, and you, you were dealing poker, and you dealt yourself four aces, it's a nice hand, and then the next hand, you deal yourself four aces, and then the next hand, you deal yourself four aces, and then the next hand, you deal yourself four aces, the other guys at the table, are going to have a problem with you. They're going to stand up, they're going to pull out their guns, because everybody has a gun, and they're going to shoot you, because this is America, and, so they stand up, they pull out guns, and you respond, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, in the infinite number of universes, in time and space, in the infinite number of saloons, where people play poker, isn't it possible, that we just happen to be in the one, where I get dealt four aces, seven times in a row, you know what they're going to say, dang Clem, I never thought about that, you know Jessup, he's got a point, no you're going to get shot, because, while possible, it's actually more probable, at that point, that something else is at play, and that's kind of what we have with earth, while possible, that Yahtzee, we hit the lottery, it's actually, actually at some point, more probable, that there was some intention, there was some design, and that's what the Bible says, that we have a creator, who creates the heavens, and he creates the earth, and on the earth, he begins to play out this story, so, jump down, to verse 26, and we're going to read the last part, of this chapter, and what's happened so far, is God has, he speaks, so it says, God said, and then God saw, and then it was good, and that's what plays out, this whole time, as he creates everything else, and then verse 26, then God said, let us make man, in our image, after our likeness, and let them, so mankind there, let them, have dominion, over the fish of the sea, and over the birds, and over the heavens, and over the livestock, and over all the earth, and over every creeping thing, that creeps on the earth, so God created man, in his own image, in the image of God, he created him, male and female, he created them, so it's not just man, the way we use that word, it's man as in, human, humankind, so God created man, in his own image, in the image of God, he created him, male and female, he created them, and God blessed them, and God said to them, be fruitful and multiply, and fill the earth, and subdue it, and have dominion, over the fish of the sea, and over the birds of the heavens, and over every living thing, that moves on the earth, and God said, behold I have given you, every plant yielding seed, that is on the face of the earth, and every tree with seed, and its fruit, you shall have them for food, and to every beast of the earth, and every bird of the heavens, and everything that creeps on the earth, everything that has breath of life, I have given them, every green plant for food, and it was so, and God saw everything, that he had made, and behold it was very good, and there was evening, and there was morning, the sixth day, so God playing out this story, he creates an earth, and then he begins to create, all the things on the earth, and there's suddenly this break, in the way that this is playing out, so it was God said, and then God saw, and it was good, so God said let there be light, and God saw the light, and the light was good, and that's how it plays out, the rest of the time, until we get to verse 26, and then the story kind of breaks up, because it says God said, let us make man in our image, that's the Godhead talking to himself, that's God the Son, God the Father, and God the Holy Spirit, having a discussion about, we're going to make a relational, personal being, and as the pinnacle of creation, God makes humans, and he creates us in his image, so when an artist paints a portrait, the goal of the portrait, is to show what that person was like, what they looked like, and when God made humanity, the purpose, was to show what he's like, so from the very beginning, we see that we were made, by God, with purpose, that we have, we were made by God, and for God, in his image, so that in and of ourselves, we have dignity, and value, and worth, now for Americans, us as Americans, this is massively important, because we believe some things, are just undeniably true, they're true, whether you believe they're true, they're true, whether you think they're true, there are some things, that are just true, we hold certain truths, to be self-evident, I'm going to read this to you, we hold these truths, to be self-evident, that all men are created equal, and that they are endowed, by their creator, with certain unalienable rights, that among these, are life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness, okay, that's a nice sentence, all men are created equal, and are endowed, with unalienable rights, but here's the question, why? Why? Why are men created equal, why are they endowed with rights, you can't take away from them?

You can't take away from them? Because, for the majority, of human history, and the majority, of humans, that have walked on the earth, that has not been self-evident, that statement right there, has not been believed, what has been believed, is we're more powerful, so we get to do what we want, what has been believed, is people on the other side, of that border, are less than human, what has been believed, is if your skin, looks this color, or that color, mostly just not my color, you're less than human, what has happened,

Is holocaust, and forced slavery, and sex trafficking, throughout the majority, of human history, if you're old, if you're weak, if you're young, if you're small, if you're mentally deformed, if you're a woman, throughout the history, of humanity, we haven't believed that, this is massively important, there's a French philosopher, his name is Jacques Derrida, he's not a Christian, not a God fear, not religious at all, but what it says, it says he looks at human rights, here's what he comes up with, the concept of crime,

Against humanity, is a Christian concept, and I think there would be, no such thing, in the law today, without the Christian heritage, the Abrahamic heritage, the biblical heritage, so do you hear what he's saying, he's saying he's, he's a philosopher, and he's looking at law, and he's saying, there would not be, crimes against humanity, this idea, comes out of Christianity, because we don't see it, showing up other places, and it comes out of, Genesis 1, we were made in the image of God, with worth, with value,

Because we were created, by him, for him, for his purposes, and he's right, you wouldn't see that, you don't see that, showing up other places, outside of this heritage, and we don't believe this, for other things, so in Africa, every day, there's a wild pack of lions, that roams around, and prays on the small, and the weak, and the old, and the sick, eating cute little gazelle, zebras, elephants, not the big elephants, but the small,

Cute ones, just mows them down, doesn't even feel bad, and nobody riots, and nobody protests, and we don't have a hashtag, zebra lives matter, because they're animals, and they're different, than humans, there's a reason, why an animal, can kill an animal, and we're like, that's what animals do, but you can't get mad, at someone, and walk into a Walmart, and hit them in the head, with a shovel, like it's, there's a reason, because humans, have dignity,

And value, and worth, given to us, by our creator, and historically, anytime we get this wrong, historically, anytime we begin to, not believe this, we begin to elevate, animals, or we begin to, lower other types of humans, or all humans, this goes horrendously, wrong, it becomes horrific, we have forced slavery, we have racism, we have genocide, we have holocaust, every time we get this wrong, that we were created, by God,

For his purposes, in his image, so don't, don't lose me there, stick with me there, because you miss, you lose too much, if you miss this, let me, let me show you a few things, that this gives us, automatically, if God is God, and created everything, and made us in his image, here's what this gives us, it gives you the right, to be outraged, over things you should be outraged over, I read an article yesterday, about a tribe in Africa, that when girls turn 10, they take them, away from their families,

They take them, to a remote part of the village, and the older women, in their tribe, teach them, how to please men, and then they are told, when you get done with this, it's called initiation, when you get done with this, go find an older man, and begin having sex, 10 year olds, and that's how you become a woman, and that's what womanhood is, in that culture, and they try to stay away, from western people, because western people, try to come in and say, no no no no no no, this isn't okay, this isn't good for you, this isn't how this should work,

And without, this, we don't have a leg to stand on, without that we were made, in God's image, you actually don't have, any argument, other than a cultural argument, which is this is the way I feel, but when you have this, you have the right to be outraged, you have the right to step in, and say no you can't, you can't just kill people, because they're Jewish, no no you can't, you can't treat girls like that, just because they have no power, in your society, sex trafficking is not okay, we lose this, we lose crime against humanity, if we lose that we were created, in the image of God,

And designed for his good purposes, it also gives you automatically, you have value and worth, just by the nature, of being made in the image of God, you have dignity, value and worth, given to you, granted to you, placed in you, by God, it also gives you purpose, your purpose is going to be, ultimately found in God, satisfied in God, you will find ultimate fulfillment, in God, because you were designed by him, for his purposes, so let me give you, some helpful advice here, it's not work, you're not going to find your purpose, and value in work,

And every time we get that wrong, every time we begin to believe, that if I have this job, or if I'm just this type of person, if I make this amount of money, I'll be fulfilled, I'll be satisfied, doesn't happen, it's not going to be found, in other people's opinions of you, if I could just get people to like me, if everybody around me, knew how wonderful I was, if I could just have other people, like it goes terribly wrong, every time we seek our fulfillment, our value, our purpose in that, it's not going to be found in yourself, you don't exist for your own glory, and joy, and fulfillment, like you're not going to find fulfillment, if you just seek satisfaction,

It's not going to happen, it's a little bit like, let's say, hypothetically, but it doesn't have to be hypothetical, let's say, hypothetically, you invite me over to your house, to eat delicious food, because you found out, I like delicious food, and so you say, something along the lines of, Chet, do you like delicious food, and do you want to come to my house, and eat it, and I say something along the lines of, heck yes I do, and then we high five, let's say you invite me over to your house, you're preparing food, I'm hanging out, and then I look and I go,

No, you painted your walls the wrong color, you're going to think, well that was rude, but maybe, because I preach, I'm kind of a pastor, you'll let me slide on that one, you'll just think, well I didn't know he was a jerk, surprise, and then I say, ah, your coffee table's in the wrong spot, and then I'm like, I'll just, I'll move it, so I just like, start messing with your stuff, I'm like, dude you don't have a DVR, seriously, like eventually, you'd be like,

Hey bro, it's in your house, not your zone, not designed for you, and you would be very correct, and the truth is, every time we walk around on earth, like this was supposed to fill us up, we're just a whiny house guest in God's house, it wasn't designed for our ultimate satisfaction, it wasn't built around us, we are the pinnacle of creation, he pauses and makes us in his image, which gives us dignity and value and worth, we're not the point of creation, and we're ultimately going to find our satisfaction, and our joy in him, and that's actually, what makes romance so compelling, and so harmful, turn with me to Romans chapter 1, that's going to be on page 610, Romans chapter 1, it's going to mirror some of what we just read,

And it's going to help us diagnose, some of the issues that we have, when we begin to approach, gender, sexuality, why us being made in the image of God, created by a creator, who has creator rights over us, and us being made in the image of God, is actually what makes romance and love, so compelling and so harmful, we're going to start in verse 21, for although they knew God, they did not honor him as God, or give thanks to him, but they became futile in their thinking, and their foolish hearts were darkened, claiming to be wise, they became fools, and exchanged the glory of the immortal God, for images, resembling mortal man, and birds, and animals,

And creeping things, therefore God gave them up, in the lusts of their hearts, to impurity, to dishonoring of their bodies, among themselves, because they exchanged the truth of God, for a lie, and worshipped, and served the creature, rather than the creator, who is blessed forever, amen, for this reason, God gave them up, to dishonorable passions, and so we'll stop there, it's the end of a sentence, seems good to me, what that just said was, God was designed to be God, and then it says, but we, they,

Swapped out, the creator, for creation, for images, that look like man, that look like birds, that just any kind of created thing, gets put there, and here, here's what happens, basically what it's saying, is that, the translation where it says, they exchanged the truth about God, for a lie, some commentators will say, that actually should be the lie, they exchanged the truth about God, for the lie, which is that, something other than God, can fill us up, something other than God, can be our purpose,

Something other than God, can make us happy, something other than God, can fit in this spot, and that's the lie, ever since Adam and Eve, rebelled in the garden, and messed all of this up, and we followed in their tracks, doing the exact same thing, that's the lie, that something other than God, can take his spot, and here's what happens, when that happens, we begin to worship, and serve created things, so you don't just have, a lazy husband, you have a husband, who's rejected, his God-given design, you don't just have an, and he's begun to believe,

That his comfort, is above all, above all, and that's where ultimate satisfaction, and hope comes from, you don't just have an anxious wife, you have a wife, who's begun to believe, that security, is what will fill her up, that the ability, to control situations, is where ultimate, satisfaction will come, you don't just have, an angry tyrant dad, you have a dad, who's begun to believe, that he deserves, to be worshipped, that he deserves, to be submitted to, that he deserves, to be exalted,

I have a 10 month old son, I don't just have a son, who's learning, how to throw fits, I have a son, who believes, fundamentally, that the world, exists for him, and he can't say those words, but that's what he believes, and he started doing this, like you take something from him, and he does this, and he's like 10 months old, he can't even hold his head up, he's going to fall over, you have to like hold him, but what this is, is dad, I'm so sick of your garbage, right now, like how dare you, like he likes to dance,

So he's holding my phone, and dancing, because he was playing music, and I took it from him, and he just goes, and puts his head down, because that is his, now he touched it, and stuck it in his mouth, so he owns it, and you can't take it from him, because the world exists, to revolve around him, his little heart, believes that, that's how kids learn mine, is one of their first words, we were hanging over, hanging out with our community group, and there was two little kids, Archer had already picked up two coasters, and was walking around, we're pretty sure he hit them, before we left,

So we were like, I hope y'all didn't want all your coasters, to the person who's hosting us, and another like two-year-old girl, comes over, and she takes that from him, and she goes, this is mine, and my wife was like, it's not either of y'all's, you can't just walk into someone's house, and claim things, so my wife pushed her to the ground, I'm just kidding, my wife's in Kid City, so if you have children up there, I'm just kidding, she didn't push me, but I can say whatever I want, because she can't hear me, but that's what happens, we begin to believe, other things will fill us up, and here's,

See what it says in the text, don't, we can't gloss past this, twice, therefore, it's in verse 24, therefore, therefore, God gave them up, in their lusts of their hearts, to impurity, to dishonoring of their bodies among themselves, because they exchanged the truth about God for a lie, and worshipped and served the creature, rather than the creator, who is blessed forever, amen, for this reason, God gave them up, to dishonorable passions, twice, it says, the outcome of this, the outcome of God being moved from his rightful place,

Is, sexual, that one of the major outcomes, is that romance, and passion, and lust, get elevated, and here's why, we were made in the image of God, and are therefore, the easiest thing to believe, will fill us up, and give us purpose, and give us a reason to live, the easiest thing for you to put in the place of God, is another human, because humans were made in the image of God, they are the second best, so a lot of people, like we place a high value on money, we believe that money will, like money and success, America loves that, but I'll tell you something,

That we also believe, every time someone's house burns down, but their whole family is okay, what do they say, it's helped me realize, what was really important, and we all go, yeah, you're right, people, yes, how could we forget, when we watch movies, sure, we like money, we like success, and if that could be thrown in, that sounds great, but what happens in the movies, the person gives up money, they give up success, to chase after their love, they're willing to go, go for broke,

They're willing to be poor, if they can just have this person, they're willing to quit their job, if it means they can spend time, with their children, because, humans, made in the image of God, are the easiest thing, to replace God with, because they come, so close, to giving us purpose, and filling us up, and giving us value, you're going to be able, to find that more, in your children, than you will be in a job, you're going to be able, to find that more, in chasing after romance, than you'll find it, in other things,

Because humans, are made in the image of God, and therefore, the easiest thing, to swap it out for him, but it becomes very, harmful and destructive, when we do that, and so what it says is, they elevated romance, they elevate passion, they elevate lust, they elevate sexuality, to a place that it shouldn't be in, and here's what happens, let's just take a second, to look at our culture, if we're doing that, if we've replaced God, with romance, with sexuality, with gender, I would expect, that you have a culture,

That looked like ours, we have a three billion, a dollar a year, industry in online dating, three billion a year, that's pretty big, we have a 51 billion dollar, industry, in the marriage industry, the wedding industry, 51 billion dollars, to give you a place for that, I think last year, the NFL had, was a 10 billion dollar, so 51 billion, in the wedding industry, the porn industry, which is really hard, to track Numbers on, because a lot of it's online, a lot of it's under reported, or unreported, but estimates put it,

Somewhere competing with, the NFL, Major League Baseball, NBA, ABC, NBC, CBS, and some of them, are going to say, it's actually more, than the NFL, the NBA, and the MLB combined, or it's more than, ABC, CBS, NBC combined, but it depends, on who's doing the study, and really what we just see, is that that's a major, industry for us, I think, you begin to see,

In our culture, where we just start assuming, yeah you're supposed, to get married, yeah part of your story, is a romance story, absolutely, and if you're not married, there's got to be, something wrong with you, like we begin, to believe that, we begin to say things like, I just want to get married, because I don't want to be alone, like our options, are marriage, or loneliness, because we've begun, to spread this information, you have, your great, your grandmother, every time you see her,

Your great aunt, every time you see her, says, met anybody yet, because we've begun, to believe that value, and worth, come from, another human, come from, a relationship, come from, romance, we've begun to place, value here, we, we would have movies, that say things like, you realize that trying, to keep your distance from me, will not lessen my affection, for you, all efforts to save me, from you will fail,

That's from the fault, in her stars, or I love you, you're my only reason, to stay alive, that's from Twilight, a lot of y'all recognized it, but we have, we have stories, that reinforce this, and we just hear it, and we go, yes, like you, you can't watch Braveheart, without his, his wife dying, that he married in secret, and then she dies, and you're like, absolutely, you want to kill all of England, makes sense, I'm with you,

Let's do it, because these are the stories, we tell, this is what we believe, this is where, so you have a book, movie combo, about an abusive relationship, involving bondage, and dominance, and submission, and masochism, that grosses, 500 million dollars, worldwide, it's one of the most profitable, movies of 2015, in Fifty Shades of Grey, that the song, that comes from that, with Ellie Golding's hit song, that says this, on the edge of paradise, every inch of your skin,

Is a holy grail, I've got to find, only you can set my heart on fire, or Tove Love's song, oh, that's the, touch me like you do, touch, touch me like you do song, the Ellie Golding song, Tove Love's song, that says this, you're gone, you're gone, and I've got to stay high, all the time, to keep you off my mind, which is basically, my sex romance, romance God failed, so I need to turn, to my drug God, to keep my brain, like we,

From One Direction, from every song, the song, I Believe in Miracles, that we sing all the time, one of the lyrics in that song was, I met you yesterday, and now you're in my bed, I believe in miracles, and, it's catchy, but, our culture, has begun to play, so much weight, here, and then I would think, if you see a culture, that's doing this, that's elevated romance, that's elevated sexuality, then you would start having, what we have, with just some serious,

Backlash to it, you'd have really high, divorce rates, you'd hear us saying, things like, she just doesn't meet my needs, he doesn't just, he just doesn't make me, happy anymore, well you need to find, someone who makes you happy, you need to find someone, who completes you, you need to find your soulmate, and we'd all just nod along, yes, correct, a person who can complete me, the one special someone, out there, and if this person, isn't working, if we're having some friction, obviously not the one special someone,

You'd have really high, sexual expectations, all the time, across the board, all you have to do, is look at a magazine rack, to understand that this is, rampant in our culture, have a lot of cynicism, when it comes to romance, and I believe, that you begin to see, what we're seeing, which is the ultimate sin, the unforgivable sin, in our culture, is, not letting someone, be with the person, they want to be with, that's unforgivable, you can't deny someone, the ability to be with someone, they want to be with,

Why, because we've swapped out God, and we've elevated each other, we've elevated romance, we've elevated people, who were made in his image, because we're the easiest thing, to elevate to that spot, and that's what we have, that's what's happening, we have, it's all over the place, and so, what do we do, how does this work, there's a, Danny Akins, a guy who wrote a book, and there's a story, about an anthropologist, that was hanging out, with the Hopi people, and he asked them, he said,

Why are all your songs, about rain, so he'd gotten to know them, they'd gotten to know him, they'd shared culture, back and forth, and so he asked, why all of your songs, are about rain, and the Hopi guy said, because that's life, for us, that's salvation, for us, without rain, we're dead, and then the Hopi guy said, why are all your songs, about romance, that's life, for us, that's salvation, for us, and without romance,

We're dead, would be the answer, so the question left, if we were made, by a creator, in his image, to image him, and to find our ultimate, fulfillment and purpose, in him, and then because of that, because of that, very beautiful truth, we're the easiest thing, to put in his place, so that we've swapped him out, for smaller, broken images, the question is, how does he respond, God, the answer, is that God, came to earth,

In the person of Jesus, to live out perfectly, what we should have done, that actually, Colossians is going to say, he is the image, of the invisible God, so we were made, in the image of God, but he is the image of God, so Jesus comes, and lives perfectly, what it means to be human, and what it means, for us to relate to God, that's what Christ was doing, and you know, what he didn't do, he didn't get married, he didn't have a relationship, he didn't have sex, he didn't chase romance, and this baffles us, to the point,

That we have things, like the Da Vinci Code, and movies, like the last temptation, of Christ, because obviously, he had to have, a secret romance, because otherwise, how would he be fulfilled, how would he be a person, it's got to be fake, if he doesn't, but no, he comes and lives, and he shows, that there's value, in being celibate, there's value, that romance isn't God, and then he lives, perfectly on our behalf, and swaps himself, out for us,

This is God's response, to us, swapping him out, we're going to read, 2nd Corinthians 521, we'll show it on the screen, for our sake, he made him, that's God made Jesus, we read this a lot, but God made Jesus, to be sin for us, to be sin, who knew no sin, so that in him, we might, become the righteousness, of God, God made Jesus, to be sin, so that in him, we could become, the righteousness of God, that's God's response,

That the perfect image, of God, when we swapped God out, for broken smaller images, that the perfect image, of God, would swap himself, out for us, and what we tried, to receive, what we ultimately, chased after, when we swapped him out, was brokenness, harm, sin, death, destruction, and you know, when Jesus, swapped himself out for us, you know what he took, brokenness, harm,

Sin, death, and destruction, that's what he took, on himself, when he went to the cross, was our brokenness, our pain, our sin, our death, our destruction, so that, he could give us back, what we had exchanged, the first time, so that he could give us back, God, a real relationship, with God, and the ability, to enter into a relationship, through faith, and have our purposes, re-fulfilled,

That's what Jesus, did for us, we were made, in the image of God, and therefore, we're the easiest thing, to swap out for him, and then Jesus, as the image of God, swapped himself, back out for us, to reverse what we had done, so that we could be, welcomed back in, now, next week, we start saying, some offensive things, next week, God gets aggressive, when it comes to, how we view sexuality, romance, hopefully he's already started,

To help us see, where we're off, but if we miss this, if we miss, that we were made, in the image of God, if we miss, that God loves us, so much, that he invites us, into a bigger, more true love story, one of the reasons, that romance, love, finds resonance, in our soul, is that, the true story, of history, of humanity, is a beautiful love story, where Jesus, overcomes the odds,

To rescue his people, that's one of the reasons, we love that story, because that's what, Jesus did for us, in the cross, overcame all the odds, to bring us back, even when we were separated, separated, by massive separation, if we miss this, that you have a God, who created you, and therefore has creator rights, over you, therefore has a design, and you miss, that he loves you so much, that in the midst, of our rebellion, and brokenness, he was unwilling, to let us go,

But came to rescue us, if you miss both, of those things, the rest of it, will only seem, restrictive, will only seem, like it traps us, will only seem, oppressive, the rest of his design, for human sexuality, can only be seen, but when we know, that he has a design for us, and that he loves us, it sets us free, to follow him, so we're not afraid, to say the offensive things, we're going to say, but it mostly, we want to be helpful, and if you don't get,

That you were made, in the image of God, and have worth, and value, and dignity, and that Jesus loved you, so much to rescue you, you're going to miss, everything else, the band's going, to come back up, God I pray, that you would work, in us, to give us the grace, to follow you, give us the faith, to trust you, when you say things, to us, that we disagree with, help us to see, that you're the creator, and therefore have a,

Vantage point we don't have, and help us to see, that you love us, so much in the cross, that you're willing, to die to rescue us, that you are ultimately, trustworthy, with our lives, and with everything, God I pray, that you'd help all of us, to submit, our masculinity, our femininity, and our sexuality, to you, for your glory, as we follow after you, in Jesus name, amen, amen, amen, amen,

Amen, amen, amen, amen, amen, amen, amen, amen, amen, amen, amen, amen, amen, amen, amen, amen, amen, amen, amen,

Intro to Covenant

Sugar, Spice & Everything Nice?

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Life, Liberty, and the Pursuit of Romance

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